God's Beautiful Chaos

Francine Rivers Give-away!

2011-03-22T13:10:00.001-07:00

Francine Rivers Giveaway!

Remember the first time you really connected with what you were reading or when you first discovered an author whose words always seemed to lift you off the page and carry you to a different time and place? Francine Rivers is that author to many people. She may even be that author to you. If she is, you’ll be happy to know that there are several ways you can learn more about her and connect.

FrancineRivers.com—This is the official website for Francine Rivers. You’ll find information on her books, her life, upcoming events, and even access to her personal blog.

Francine Rivers Facebook page—This is a must for the true Francine fan. Here you’ll find the latest news and information on everything Francine Rivers. You can connect with other fans, discuss her books, and even receive exclusive content.

The Francine Rivers Facebook page is well on its way to reaching 100,000 fans. To celebrate this milestone, we’re giving away some fantastic prizes!

Until April 4, you can get a free e-book of Leota’s Garden. You don’t even need to own an e-reader to take advantage of this special offer.

Visit one of these sites to download your free e-book:

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

Sony

Christian Book Distributors

We’ll also be holding a drawing with these prizes. (Each prize listed is for the regular, non-e-book edition.)

Grand Prize—complete Francine Rivers Library

Subsequent Prizes –

First Place Prize (1)—1 copy each of Her Mother’s Hope/Her Daughter’s Dream

Second Place Prize (2)—1 Mark of the Lion boxed set

Third Place Prize (3)—1 copy of A Lineage of Grace

Fourth Place Prize (4)—1 copy of Sons of Encouragement

Here’s how you can enter for a chance to win:

You must complete one or more of the following actions:

- “Like” the Francine Rivers Facebook page

- Invite at least 10 friends to “Like” the Francine Rivers Facebook page (using the “share” link of Facebook or through e-mail).

- Share this contest on your blog, Twitter, or Facebook page.

Fill out the form below to let us know which actions you completed. Each action counts as one entry.

We’ll choose the winners at random and announce them after the Leota’s Garden e-book giveaway ends on April 4!

Any questions? Leave them as a comment on this blog post.

Thank you for participating!

She did what? Oh my I can't believe it.....

2011-02-25T17:20:00.000-08:00

Yes, ladies, we have all said that. I have at least once today for sure. We are all gossipy women, right? So what is really behind all that gossip? Judgement? Hurt? Hate? Who knows. I went to an amazing conference called Thrive this weekend. It was so fun and I met so many new women. I even Zumba danced for about 2 minutes. The main speaker talked a lot about judgements and first impressions and pleasing society. For the last year I have really been working hard with God through this process. I see a woman I and I instantly judge her, hair to short, too little make-up, shirt too low-cut, wrong nail polish, etc. I really am quite the witch. But ultimately what my heart is saying is, I wish I could wear my hair that short, if only i could leave the house without makeup, if I was skinny enough i could get away with low-cut, I would like a tramp if i wore nail polish. How many of you do that too?

On Sunday we had family night. I had the kids each do something without a part of them. For example, no elbows, knees, sight, touch, smell, hearing, etc. Kevin put make-up on Nick, Nick put toe nail polish on Kevin, Giovanni had to get up with no bendable knees or elbows. You get the picture. I used it to show my kids the importance of every part of our bodies. God knew what he was doing when he created us. We just sometimes forget.

I admit, my self-esteem is pretty low. For those of you who know me, you know my darkest struggles. I struggle with food addiction. I know it is a problem, and God and I are working on it. I know people from my past look at me and say "Wow, she got fat!" And they are right, in many ways. It used to consume me all the time, but now I am starting to learn that who I am is not determined by people in my life, but by my Creator. I have chosen to eat unhealthy. I could continue living my life blaming my abuse, my ex-husband, and other bad people who hurt me, but ultimately it is up to me. I am redeemed and restored through Christ. I have to constantly give up myself to him, to die to myself, just so I can live again. Someday I will probably have my weight under control, but for now, I trust the Lord is putting in motion everything that needs to be done in order for me to continue my relationship with Him. He loves me no matter what I look like, and that is all that matters.

"Let your light so shine before men that He may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:16

Phone voice

2011-02-02T14:31:00.000-08:00

Do you all have the "phone voice"? You know that voice that comes out in the midst of a rant when the phone rings? "What do you mean you didn't see the harm throwing large rocks at car?" Ring ring. "Hello? Oh yes, now is a good time. Oh goodness thongs are wonderful here!" You say this is the most pleasant tone as you run your finger across your through in a you-see-do-dead sign. My husband, bless his heart, loves to point out my phone voice.

It got me thinking, do I have a God voice, too? When I pray do I pray differently depending on who is in my presence? I think I do. It makes some sense. I would pray for the spirit of evil to be released and renounced in front of my four year old and I wouldn't pray for dreams of butterflies and pink monkeys with my friends. But, what about when I am angry. Do I pray angry too. My husband and I are bad sometimes about praying for her attitude to change or him to start listening. Instead of that we should be praeing for their healing and restoration back to Christ.

I have to remember that God doesn't use a phone voice with me. He didn't pour fire on Sodom and turn to Egypt and say "oh aren't you cute with your flooding farming techniques." No, He is the same today tomorrow always. Through His anger there is love. There is no condemnation if you are in Christ. He loves me for me. I am so grateful for this.

So the next time I find myself surrounded by my life chaos, and you are calling, I can't guarantee o will answer the phone very pleasantly.

Whatever ... Philippians 4:8

Who made God?

2011-01-27T09:20:00.001-08:00

"Who made God?" said a little voice from the backseat this morning as I pulled into my friends driveway. Ahnika even reminded me how hard that question was to answer.

Have you ever asked questions like that? I do all the time. I explained to little miss that it is through faith we believe God is and was forever. I told her how Daddy and I didn't know anything about her or the other three kids before we brought them home forever. It was through out faith in God that we obeyed God's call to adopt them. As I gave her a kiss and hug I prayed she would keep her faith an innocence.
I am so thankful she trusts me enough to ask these tough questions. I am thankful I can say I don't know the answer to tough questions.

I remember how I used to laugh at my classmates In high school who went to youth group. I thought they were losers. I just didn't understand how they could be so obsessed with something that didn't exist. I wonder how many of them prayed for me and for a broken heart so I would have to find Him and the salvation He offers. I just didn't know any better. I thought I was more important than some God they talked about.

Oh my, how wrong and dumb I was! As I continue my relationship with Christ I see how big God is. He pulled me from the muck and the myre. He washed me clean. I was renewed and restored to be who God created me to be. He promises I don't have to step back into the mud, He has roped off the muddy pit. It is only if I choose to enter then I do. In my past I never thought the God would continue to clean me off. But the cool thing is - He does! Every time I fill myself and cover myself with muck, God is standing there with a hose waiting to "rinse" me off. God has set me free from my past. Once I embraced His free help, my life changed forever.

Lord remind me that even in my life chaos you show me that everything falls into place his just as He wants.

Abundant Blessings

2011-01-26T14:19:00.001-08:00

How do I get so blessed? As I meet more and more women I realize how broken we all are. God didn't design us for this, His design was for Holiness, purity, joy, relationship, truth. Everyday I see little glimpses of these in my life. Today I woke up to little sweet voices asking me what coffee I wanted. I received and "I love you" from my son. I confirmed God will be blessing us with a largest return. The sun is shining. I received a note that my friend bought me shiro in Ethiopia! The same friend met her soon to be son for the first time. I am connecting with lost friendships. I have the privilege to pray for my friends and family. I couldn't ask for more.

I hold tight to each miracle, joy, and light. Especially when times are tough. It is hard to remember Gods promises in the midst of trials. I remember feeling like i couldn't go on last year when my depression was at its worst. But yet, my struggles were no surprise for God. He knew what was going to happen and He made sure I was taken care of.

The last couple of days I have been praying for a friend of mine. She has been through so much in her life, yet her quiet spirit and strength give me hope.

So, what hopes do you see today in yourself, in others, or just around you? Write them down so you can pull them out when all seems lost. Remember, His plans are for a hope and a future, not for destruction (Jeremiah 29:11).

So, like me, as you go through your life chaos, remember it is not chaos to God. He knows what will happen next.

Pain in the foot, leg and wrist

2011-01-22T13:42:00.000-08:00

As many of you know, last night me and my daughter-in-law went ant got our first tattoos. It was an experience like no other. Mikaya didn't fair so well in the pain department. I heard "I am nervous. That hurts. No really it hurts." from Mikaya. But she was a trooper and held on. Then it was my turn. It didn't hurt at first. Then as he continued to add detail to the already tattooed areas, I could feel pain. It still throbs and stings. But it will get better, soon hopefully.

Isn't that how life is, though? Painful? I look back over my past full of abuse, hate, fear and pain and I wonder why. Why me, Lord? Why not someone else. The Brible says we are God's masterpiece. Isn't that just like a tattoo? It was painful, but the brilliance of the artwork is beautiful! What a reward to see everyday. I am refined by fire. I am made beautiful and as I struggle through pain, another masterpiece is born.

Lord, remind me as the chaos in my head continues to question and spin that I am God's masterpiece now and forever.

Superhero

2011-01-20T22:08:00.001-08:00

For a time Superhero by Hillsong Kids played 24/7 in the Raskell house. We haven't heard it for awhile. Is it sad I play it secretly at work and sing "Jesus your my Superhero, you my star, my best friend." And of course I add in the hand motions.

So, who is my Superhero? I would like to believe it is Jesus, but do I make others my Superhero? Captain Husband, Superkid, Ahnivorine, Spider? I know I do. We are a family of comic lovers. We have superman ornaments for Malchi and Gio, sponge bob for kev, scoop for Nick, spidey for Caleb, land princess anything for the girls. So, what does that say? We long for a Superhero. It is the savior we need, it is in our created beings.

So, today I have to remind myself that Jesus is my Superhero. He is willing and able to always be here for me without question in time of need.

Lord, through this chaos, help me to let you save the day!

Dilating - a blurry world

2011-01-19T08:36:00.001-08:00

I sit here at the eye doctor as my eyes get funky. You would think with all of today technology I shouldn't have to sit her while the lights get bright and I struggle to type these words. What would happen if my eyes stayed this way? I would walk around squinting and bumping into things.

Isn't life sometimes like a dilation? We see everything clearly - Christ, home, work, kids, etc. Then WHAM one day we can't see where we are going. Satan is good at deceiving me into believing I can see clearly or that the light isn't that bright.

Today I woke up an hour late (me, go figure!). I got ready in a daze reminding the children in such friendly terms we had to get going. The daze continued for quite awhile. I dropped Ahnika off, and realized it was time to change the outcome of my day. So I prayed. Lord, clear my mind, my heart. I don't like to be in this blurry world. As I continued talking with Him, I saw the.ha differently.

God wants us to seek Him in all things. I CAN do all things I. Christ who gives me strength. Even when I want to give up, He is always there beside me encouraging. He clarifies every aspect of my life. I just have to remember to allow him to. For so many years I walked around an empty shell. I was lost. After all I had gone through in my life, I lived lost, broken, scared, controlling, and full of shame. I coped with drugs, alcohol, food, and control of others. Finally, God said NO MORE and I actually listened! He cleared up the blurry. The veil was torn. I am and always will be free.

So, thank you Jesus for taking away the blurry of my chaos and my past. Continue to give me clarity.

Revelation

2011-01-16T16:14:00.000-08:00

Do you ever have those times when something nags at you for a while, and then you get a revelation of Ahhh, I should have listened a long time ago! That is what I have been going through lately. The Spirit has been nagging me about a few things lately, and a lot of it came to light today. I was sitting in a church service this morning, and the pastor talked about all of our "secrets" should be brought to light. Now, my fear grows when I think about being real with others. "What will they think of me? Will they still be my friend?" But, then I realize it isn't their approval I seek, but Gods. He was there when I made mistakes, He already knows where I was every step of my life. He is light, and all my sins and the sins against me are known to Him. So, what should I fear? Nothing, yet I still do.

I have some decisions to make over the next few months. Decisions God is leading me through, but sometimes i stop in my tracks, not wanting to go on. Thankfully, I have been surrounding by a group of amazing women, their families, and my family urging me to open up and trust God. I am ready for this step. I am tired of hiding behind my past and my hurts. It molded me into who I was and who I am, but it does not determine who I can be in Christ. Only God can do that. My choices, my actions and those of others has altered my entire life. Abuse, control, hate, hurt, alcohol, drugs, sex, loss, love, needs, wants all have led to one thing - FORGIVENESS in Christ. I have made so many poor choices, but God has redeemed and freed me from the bondage that used to hold me down.

Yesterday I celebrated my birthday with my family (minus the two on their honeymoon). God has brought me out of the muck into the light of being surrounded by ones who love me for who I am - mistakes, weight, tears, annoyances, all of it. God has blessed me beyond measure. He has reached His hand out to my loved ones and blessed me with each of them.

I was reading in Revelations 3 today and the church of Sardis reminds me of so many churches and people I know or have been involved in. On the outside alive, but deep down on the inside dead. I have lived like this for so long. It was easy to show others how "alive" I was, yet underneath it all I was so hurt, shameful, guilt-ridden, angry, lost, scared, alone, isolated. No one knew. I wasn't living to the full extent God created me to do. Thankfully, He was gentle with me and opened my eyes to the Truth. Through this process I have also seen God's answer from other Godly people and churches to show me truth (2 Thessalonians 1:4). Through this I was able to live in freedom, as I continue to do.

There is so much out there to hurt us, deny us, persecute us, and hate us. We have to hold tight to His promises and His calling. We don't have to answer to man, but the one who created us - God. So, I will continue to live in my chaotic world, praising God for every part of my life. I will continue to search where I am to go to next for Him, and Him alone.

Why you not?

2011-01-14T09:08:00.001-08:00

Why you not? That is a common sentence in our house from our lovely six year old Ahnika. “Why you not make Sophia do dat?” “Why you not put lotion on Daddy?” She is so inquisitive, and comparative. My sweet little girl has the biggest and most joyful heart. Her nickname is smiles and Little Miss Sunshine. Most of the time she is happy. The thing I love about her the most is she wears her emotions on her sleeves. I can always know how she is feeling based on her eyes and facial expressions. There is truth behind her. I pray that innocence, the trust, the love of life does not diminish as she realizes the world does not see the same things she does.

When I watch her, I have to ask myself, when did I lose my innocence, my zest for the little things, my joy. I can pinpoint many times in my life when I was hurt, scared, lost, and wondering if there was more to life than what I was doing. I have shared a little bit of my story with some of my family and friends, but who really wants to know the hard stuff? What will people think of me if they knew the real me? I have created a perfect solution – I became someone different than what God had originally designed before my sins and the sins of others changed me. Funny, though, how God always wants to draw us back to His original creation in us. The beautiful girl, innocent, full of love, joy and grace. The nurturing and forgiving woman who strives to find others who just loves her. He is creating a new heart and body in me. He has sent me women who say “Wow, that sucks that happened to you. But, how does that make me not want to be here for you?” I am really starting to see that I am loveable, I am funny (yes, see yesterday’s post), I am worthy, I am a masterpiece, and I am a princess – God’s daughter. My husband loves me for me, my friends still call me (of course I don’t answer or call back because that is who I am) and text me, my kids light up when I get home, and God smiles when he watches me. It doesn’t matter that I am afraid of rejection, or that I have many addictions, or that I don’t read my bible everyday, or that my house is NEVER clean, or that I have a weight problem, or that I can be critical of others, or even that I sometimes am a hypocrite. They see past all my scars, my wounds, my bad choices and they see me for me. Sometimes when I don’t even see me. I am so thankful for the my close group of people who have been here for me over the last few years as I have started to shed off the old me and put on the new. I am free in Christ and loving it! I don’t need to ask God “Why you not” anymore, but instead I get to say “Thank you for!”

So, Lord even in the midst of screaming, tantrums, addictions, hurt, you show that out of my chaotic life there is beauty, grace, mercy and LOVE. 1 Corinthians 13 is alive and present in my life thanks to all those who are traveling this crazy journey with me.

Laughter - God's best medicine

2011-01-13T14:52:00.001-08:00

What makes you laugh the most? I live in a house so chaotic half the time I can’t tell if it is laughter or crying. The shortest sentence in the Bible is “He wept.” Is there a “He laughed”? There should be. When God created each day, I wonder what made Him laugh. Did he see the bubbles coming up from the water/earth as it separated and think “Oh yes! This is what I want to happen when my creatures fart in water?” Or did he laugh when he watched baby animals chase their tales? How often did Adam and Eve laugh, carefree before their bad choice? How much laughter happened after the Fall? We know Sarai laughed at God in negative sarcasm when Abram was told he was going to be a father in his old age.

Is there a difference between laughter and sarcastic laughter? My dear friends and I discuss this often. I personally believe it depends on the heart behind the sarcasm. My sarcasm can come out of hurt, fear, anger, or just plain joking. Thankfully I am surrounded by people who have the same sarcastic mind. It is so hard for me sometimes to be in a room when I spout off something HILARIOUS and no one laughs. Of course, it must be their own boring lives to not get MY jokes. Life is too serious to not laugh at everything – good and bad. I remember a few years ago Caleb threw a rock at our Yukon’s windshield – yes a rock. A perfect circular pattern formed. I was FURIOUS. I jumped in the car, because we were already late on top of the rock pattern, and gunned it down our driveway. CRASH! I ran into Kevin’s red car with the bull horns attached to the front. Yes, I ripped off the bumper. I wanted to cry until Giovanni yells out “Da car is mooning us!” Laughter was the only way out of my bad mood.

I can be too serious I am told by my lovely children and hubby. Loosen up; let it go, settle down! At the time I get so mad at them, but honestly (shh, don’t tell them) they are right. Why do I get so worked up in this world when it is only temporary? God created my laugh, my smile, my sparkle. Why not let it shine. I get suffocated at work sometime with the different personalities, but God is smiling with me. Wanting me to laugh. It really is the best medicine for me. Well, so is dancing but that is another post.

I leave you with my chaotic life story of how laughter is key in my marriage, my family, my relationships, and with my God. George, my hubby, emailed me today asking me “What words did we use to have the kids say because they were so funny?” I thought he meant earth translated to earf, or boots that are boops. Naw, he meant how the boys say ice cream. It sounds like (ear muffs here for those of you who may be offended by a donkey’s aka name) ass-cream. So, my dear Christian husband used to walk into Wal-Mart and ask them? “Do you want some ice cream?!” “Yes!” the boys would respond. “Yes, you want what?” he would ask. “We want ass-cream!” When I think about this I laugh – hard. It is so funny to me. It brings me back to the joy of my life and the blessings God has bestowed on me. Yes, my friends welcome to beautiful chaos.

Note to readers: I do apologize if my story about the ice cream offended anyone. Just remember, I am open, honest and real on my blog. This is about the beautiful chaos God has planted in my life, my home and my heart. We are not perfect or exempt from mistakes, only saved and forgiven. J

Mom, dinner, why are you sleeping?

2011-01-12T14:38:00.001-08:00

So, last night I came home and crashed. I went straight to bed and slept until 830. Other than really really weird dreams, I slept. Well, kind of. Add in little children. “Hi Mom!” Caleb yells from the hallway. “Mommy, dinner is ready. How come you not eat?” asks Sophia. “Why are you sleeping so much, Mom?” asks Ahnika. So, in between weird dreams, I was told dinner was ready and I needed to eat about 10 times, 3 times I got cuddle time with Sophia, and multiple times I listened to laughter from my kids. I woke up refreshed and ready to face what life gives me.

In my reading today, 1 Thessalonians 1:7 says God provides rest for us who are being persecuted. During Creation, God rested at the end. Christ rested in the boats away from people. So why shouldn’t we rest? Being a mother is hard, I admit. Unfortunately I have to face many uphill battles. I have faced debilitating depression, past abuse, illness, loss, work, etc. Some days I just want to throw my hands us and say “NO MORE!” But, no more what? Can I really give up? When kids come to cuddle can I say “No, I give up, no more cuddling?” No way. So instead I cry out to Jesus “Lord, take this hardship, this pain. Fill me with strength and understanding.” My prayers are always answered then, in many different ways. So, I can choose to go down the path of bitterness and resentment for the “lot” I have in life, or I can embrace every moment realizing God knows my outcome and His desire is for my security and love for Him. Psalm 118:24 says “This is THE day the Lord has made, we (I) will rejoice and be glad in it.” He makes each day, so today I chose to rejoice in whatever comes my way.

I must say, though, my husband has it rough. Some could say he married “damaged goods”. I say he married a woman refined by fire. He definitely has to take on more than most husbands. For me, working 40 hours a week, battling my past, commuting to work, raising multiple amounts of children, and life has taken its toll on my body and my mind. I come home pretty exhausted and he is left to do laundry, dinner, housework, etc. while I nurse my hurts and pains. I know he gets run down, but I see the light that shines around him every time he serves me. The light given to him by God. God has already prepared an amazing place for all of us who believe in heaven, but my husband’s place outshines us all. I am so grateful for God bringing us together and blessing our marriage.

So, what are your hurts and pains that hold you back from living life? Who has to pick up the “slack” when you aren’t 100%? Tell that person you love them and appreciate all they do for you. I know I forget to thank my husband enough. So, dear, THANK YOU!

Lord, remind me that the chaos of my life is for your glory and your praise, not because of ANYTHING I do.

Change - Good or Bad?

2011-01-11T15:31:00.001-08:00

So, is change good or bad? For my little Sophia, change is bad. She excels best when we are consistently the same – same bed time, same nights at home, same work schedule, etc. When any of these change, she becomes stressed and becomes needier along with more tantrums. For the last three weeks our lives have been in constant change and Sophia’s little attitude shows. Poor thing. All I can do is hold her in my arms and reassure her we love her and she is doing well. Deep breaths little one, deep breaths.

So, in the last few days I have reflected on how I handle change. Honestly, I don’t like it. I feel safe and secure when things are the same. Boring, I know. I would, if allowed, stay at home and be with the kids 24/7 if I could. Unfortunately I don’t think my family and friends would allow this. So, I have to allow some change. This week, however, I think I have reached my maximum number of changes my mind and heart can take. My son, daughter-in-law, and heart adopted daughter all showed up from Germany. My parents were here with us and then my brother showed up. Good change overall I think. But then you throw in my son getting married. Good and bad. He know has a beautiful and loving wife, but I lost my oldest son. Sniff sniff. So, finally today it all hit. I didn’t throw a tantrum, or cry, or hit, or scream, but instead I crashed – at my desk. Once I finally rallied I realized how Jesus’ disciples must have felt in the Garden the night Christ was arrested. Jesus kept waking them up, but they couldn’t stay awake. So, how do I learn to cope better with change? How do I not run myself into the ground? I want to be better equipped so I am ready to defend Christ when the enemy comes searching for Him to destroy.

I started looking for times in the bible where there was good change and bad change. Abram in Genesis 17 received a name change. He became Abraham – Father of all the nations. Jacob becomes Israel in Genesis 32. My children had names changes after we adopted them. Christ changed my name from sinner to saint when I accepted Him and was adopted into His family. In 2 Corinthians 5:17, Paul talks about taking off the old and putting on the new. Of course, like I wrote before, this change can be painful and hard. I wonder what Abram and Jacob thought when God changed them. I would be pretty scared. But, in all these were good changes. They were changes needed for the survival of His people.

What about bad change? The loss of someone or a pet? At the wedding this weekend I really struggled during the father/daughter dance thinking about how close I came to loosing my earthly Daddy and how I did lose my father-in-law who basically was a father to me. I was sad knowing he wouldn’t get to dance with his daughters here on earth. But, God gently reminded me I had to rejoice because he was transformed into a renewed and healed man. My father-in-law was and still is dancing in heaven, rejoicing in his earthly family and the marriage of his grandson. Then I thought of Romans 12:2 where Paul tells us not to conform to the world. This would most definitely be a bad change if we followed the world in our actions and decisions. I have to seek God’s help in this to NOT change based on the World’s standards. It is so hard, though! I mean really, Verizon is getting the iPhone, we have to buy a new car, everything is on clearance and my mind screams I WANT I WANT I WANT! But isn’t this the same problem Sophia is having? Tantrums because her life changed. I am really not so different from a 4 yr old some days.

So, again I ask God, “How am I supposed to cope with all this change? What am I to do?” His answer is simple – faith. Believe He knows what changes are coming. He sees and knows all. Trust. Believe. Hope. These are His promises. Even though the world may change, or my life may change, He NEVER changes. He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. He is perfect. When I am torn between normalcy and stepping into chaos, I can only seek His face, His truth, His guidance, and His wisdom. In doing that, I will NEVER fail.

Lord help me keep my chaos and future changes under control. Remind me of it, and change, when directed by you, is GOOD! Help me to keep in your will, not the will of the world.

Why are you watering your face?

2011-01-09T20:04:00.001-08:00

There is nothing more romantic than a wedding. For the first time I was able to be a parent of the groom. It was magical, really. She was a beautiful princess and he was the handsome prince. They even rode away in their white "steed". I lost a son but gained a daughter.

There are so many stories to share, but the one that stood out to me was the toast. The maid of honor spoke followed by my son, Malchi, as the best man. A couple others spoke. Then the crowd chanted "George, George, George!" And my husband stood and spoke. I was drawn back to the time of our wedding. It was the perfect day, really. It was full of love, hope and dreams. And as I listened to my husband speak, I finally realized how different my love for him was since I said "I do". It is deep, trusting, secure, faithful, unconditional. He is my true love. My husband and pretty much all of us cried during the speech. It was inspiring and moving.

When the speech was done, Ahnika turned to my sister in law Vanessa and said "Why are you getting your face wet?" She responded something I am sure, but I thought "it was your daddy". Isn't that how God is, though? He says things about His children that move us. In Psalm 45, it talks about the King coming home to take his beautiful bride. That is what marriage is about. God created the men in our lives to be Kings. To be our strength. I forget that sometimes. Especially when i forget Christ is my true husband. He is the one who is the source and promise of strength. It is through His strength and love that my marriage is as blessed as it is.

Taking off the old ...

2011-01-05T11:26:00.001-08:00

Have you ever wondered what Paul meant when he said we are to take off the old man/body and put on our new body in Christ? For years I struggled with trying to figure out what my old self was. Thanks to a group of friends and a study we are doing I am finally seeing Gods truth in this.

As I posted yesterday we recently saw the new Narnia movie. If you haven't seen it, hopefully this doesn't spoil part of it. Last night it finally hit me what Lewis was showing us with Eustace's transformation back to a boy. When Eustace finally gave up his life, his outcome, his will to someone else (Aslan), Aslan changed him back to a boy. The transformation wasn't without pain, though. Think about it, he was being changed, transformed, reconfigured. That is painful. But, for me I am realizing I need this pain. The reminder of where I was and what I have ahead of me. Christ is our real Aslan. He alone can transform me and you. He has taken this broken human full of despair, guilt, blame, shame, addictions, etc. and restored me to a beautiful creation. The woman and little girl He created me to be. It is so easy for me to forget this. I cry out to Jesus, "Free me Lord!" But, after I am free it is still a choice for me to stay free. Unfortunately I choose to put myself back in shackles. It is a revolving cycle. The hardest part is that the shackles are the same bondage, just different materials. My main materials are self-blame, shame, guilt, resentment, anger, fear, worry, and distorted reality. Just when I conquer one, I pick up another.

Today I am focusing on keeping my "dragon" skin off and not putting the shackles back on. This allows the Holy Spirit to completely fill me.

Blessings friends!

Faith - believing the unseen

2011-01-04T11:55:00.001-08:00

I have faith, right? Well sometimes I do. We went and saw the third Narnia movie on Sunday. The Voyage of the Dawn Treader. Amazing! The depth to which Lewis rights amazes my small brain. It is a reminder that faith is the center of it all.

"Do you really believe there is such a place?" Lucy asks. "We have nothing if not belief," answers Reepicheep. How true! Do I really believe there is such a place as eternity? Heaven? "If I have no love (nothing), I am a banging gong or a noisy cymbal." 1 Cor 13:1. All I really have is love to hold onto. Somedays I feel like I am holding onto nothing, but other days it is overflowing. The point I have to remember is that love is always there. Always available for me. Not from mankind, but one Man - Jesus the Christ. He is love. He is the belief that there is more to life than this evil earth.

I am so thankful for the love given to me by my family and friends. I just pray I reciprocate it back at them. I have a husband that amazes me daily at the amount of love he gives freely to me. From allowing me to talk endlessly, to playing princess with girls, to wrestling with my boys, even cooking and doing laundry when it is needed. That is love. My children who want to be with me, who say I love you, who ask me "how was work Mama?" That is love. My friends who answer my texts at all hours, who cry when I cry, make me laugh, and get my sarcasm. That is love.

So thank you to everyone who shows love to me and to others. Thank you Jesus for your ultimate unconditional love.

An you are not it!

2011-01-02T09:56:00.000-08:00

My lovely daughter Sophia drew a picture for me this morning and it said "I have the bestest Mommy ever and you are not it!" But then she proceeded to tell my husband the same thing except she changed Mommy to Daddy. But it got me thinking, do I really deserve the title bestest Mommy? Some days I am sure I do, but other days when I am tired, grumpy, hungry, etc? Absolutely not!

I am slowly learning that I can only do things in and the with the strength given to me by God. When I feel like I just can't go on, I remember He gave me the privilege to care for these kids, this husband, this house, this family, so why won't He give me the strength. He promises He will always be there. I believe Him.

As I move into the year 2011 I reflect on God's mercy, grace and love He has shown me. I couldn't imagine anything different.

We have a problem!

2010-12-28T16:33:00.000-08:00

"Mama, we have a problem. Nick is upstairs and he is PLAYING the video game. This is a problem. But now it is your problem, cuz I told you," states my four year old matter-of-factly.

This was a pretty dramatic time for her as you can see. I mean, geez, you have said no games in the past, so of course the "game warden" has to let her mama know. Is that what it is like when I go to God? "God, Daddy, we have a problem. So and so is being mean and not listening to you. She said she wasnt going to hurt me again, but she did. I told you so now it is your problem." I see two things that I fall into every once in awhile.

The first is the whole tattle-telling. I tend to forget God sees all so when I whine and complain about someone, what does my heart really want to happen? Sometimes I want lighting to come down from the sky on them, and other times I just want acknowledgment that they hurt me. Secondly, who made me the warden of everyone else's mistakes and disobedience? Do I want someone to tattle about how I gossiped about someone, or how I used to lie to my parents about drinking (sorry mom and dad)? No way! So, I guess I need to start searching my heart as to what the root of the issue is. Maybe seek God on that.

I do see a positive to this, too. I was so thankful my daughter came to me trusting I would take care of this "wrong". She also knew what was going on was "wrong" and needed to be addressed. Thankfully our God is open and willing to listen. He is trustworthy to go to for any problem big or small. And just as I explained to Sophia, I appreciated her help and I would handle the situation, God will also remind us if our problems are really a problem or if maybe there is something else there.

So, today when you talk to God, listen for His answer and see what is in your heart. Trust He will care for you always.

Crossroads

2010-12-27T11:23:00.001-08:00

This is what the Lord says, "Stop at the crossroads and look around. Ask for the old, godly way, and walk in it. Travel its path and you will find test for your souls." But you reply, "No, that is not the road we want!" Jeremiah 6:16.

We all come to a path we must choose. It could be a job, a car, a husband, college, career, driving drunk, whatever. All our choices affect us in some way - some more drastically than others. I remember many crossroads and so many times I have thought, "If only I would have chosen differently." But, there is help when I choose the wrong path, God is there waiting for me to seek forgiveness and mercy and grace. He gives it freely every time I seek it. So, as I look back on my life path all I see is beautiful stepping stones shining brightly from God's cleansing power of grace, mercy and forgiveness. I can't see the crossroads anymore, He has taken it away. The old choices are buried in the dirt. Instead each stone shows me what happened after I chose each crossroad. Redemption, salvation, love, beauty, perserverance, power, strength, and on and on. I can look forward and trust He will be there at my next crossroad.

2010-12-22T09:43:00.001-08:00

I am so thankful for sunshine! It is amazing how much it can change my attitude. God is so good and full of grace.

My vacation is over

2010-08-15T13:35:00.000-07:00

So, I guess it has been over a year since I have been on here. I don't know how many people will actually start reading it again, but hey, who cares.

The kids are starting school in a few weeks. Life is life here in our house. There is always something going on. Kevin is getting married in January, we had to put Brutus down, Nick moved out and Malcom is in Afghanistan. Those are the main things going on. Gio and Caleb will be in 4th grade this year. Crazy. Ahnika enters into first and Sophia is still in Pre-School. George loves his job and I am content in mine. God has really been with us.

Me, well, it has been a challenging year for me. God has opened so many doors from my past I barely survived some days. But, I look back and realize He was there every step of the way. I have such an amazing network of friends and family who are so supportive of us. God has showed me how to give up control to Him and my husband. I am in awe daily of the mountains He has moved in my heart.

So on church Friday night, I looked down and saw my little communion cracker had a little "pocket". I started thinking about what I could fit in that pocket. Maybe a poppy seed, or a tiny bead. But, what if that was God's pocket? Then what would it hold. God slowly worked in my brain and I realized He has three pockets. The first one is His "Sharing" pocket. This pocket is like a grandpa pocket, full of treats, money, gifts, love. This is the pocket I can dip into when I need something. A little pick me up of strength, a gift of mercy or grace, and some sweet treats of friends. Then He has the "Caring" pocket. This is the pocket where I put all my cares into. If I am worried for my sick daughter, or my Grandma Mabel, or finances, or I am happy for Friday, or I get an extra big hug from my husband, I put all these things in this pocket. God holds tightly to this one. No one else can take from this pocket. He watches over it and protects it. He is the shelter. The last pocket is just a "Garbage" pocket. This is the pocket that gets full of garbage, waste, junk I don't need. This is where my sin goes. You know that icky thing that is always there and for some reason I think I like but when I look at it I realize I don't. God takes this sin, this junk and puts it in His pocket. Regularly He empties this pocket in the trash never to be seen again. So, are you ready to start given God some of your treasures, your desires or just you junk. He is waiting and ready for you.

Pray for me that God continues to speak to me and I keep up on this. I miss sharing with you all.

Praises to the Lord above all!

2009-10-22T22:16:00.000-07:00

Giovanni's 3rd Grade picture. Hmm, retakes?
Our school lets siblings take pictures, so we did Sophia. Yes she is missing 2 teeth. We (George) had to pull them because they kept falling out after she lost them to a tragic fall when she was a baby. Long story. But it makes her so cute!
Ahnika's first year at school. She is a Kindergartener! crazyCaleb is also in 3rd grade. He is very tall. I need to measure that kid. Bets are he will be 6'5".
This was taken last year at the girls' other daycare.

So, guess what? George got a job. Of course, I am such a slacker in the blogger department that no one problem even follows me anymore. He is working for Indian Health Services. It is a Federal job. He really likes it right now. Funny how we both work for tribes. I work for the Coeur d'Alene Tribe. It is pretty cool. Life is pretty good. Busy trying to figure out the whole work schedule. Fall is definitely here and it is getting cold. No snow yet. My dad is doing better but is still very sick. We are just busy with work, kids, church, awanas, home group, kids' disciple classes and homework! Hope you all are well.

Everything

2009-08-05T12:17:00.000-07:00

I love this video. It really puts my life and what I am doing in perspective. How do we "miss it" every day. What I mean is, Jesus sacrificed so much for us. He came to earth to live like us and was beaten to death for us and I still question His love? I am not worth His sacrifice, but thankfully I can accepted it always.

My Daddy's update

2009-07-22T19:21:00.000-07:00

These pictures are of my Dad in February right before he got sick. Below is a letter I got from him today. Keep praying friends!

Dear friends, family and loved ones,

After battling Nephrotic Syndrome, Idiopathic Glomerulonephritis complicated by pulmonary emboli since April of this year, we believe that we have turned the corner in fighting this rare kidney disease. Since April, I have been pretty much incapacitated and at home. Having no strength, extreme fatigue, dizziness, depression, unstableness in walking, blackouts etc., my recent lab work indicates that the disease is headed towards remission. Once (If) it goes into remission, much like cancer, it can come back later. If remission is not reached the overall outcome is somewhat grim. My lab results still indicate that my levels are still in the dangerous zone, but improving. I’m currently taking 19 different medications to combat this disease and includes some cancer drugs (Even though I do not have cancer) and heavy prednisone (Steroid) doses. This intense combo of drugs is hard on a person’s body, yet it seems to be the best (Only) option to fight this nasty disease.

It is my firm belief that this disease correlates with my other VA disabilities and was caused by exposure to Sarin gas (Nerve agent gas) while with the U.S. Army in Desert Shield and Desert Storm. That and other toxins are probably the cause. We are now currently fighting the VA over medical bills (14 total days in the hospital is not cheap) and have filed a claim over this disease.

We have had remarkable help from Bob and Sandi and their families and friends in the Bozeman area. For you that are out of town, we are very thankful for your cards, phone calls and prayers.

The Doctor tells me that about 4 more months and the drug therapy should be over and hopefully the disease will be in remission. It will be nice to resume normal activities in life and not have medical appointments, hospital stays, lab appointments etc. rule our lives. But we remain positive and are thankful for having a graceful God and so many prayers that have been so generously given.

Thank you everyone for your love, support and prayers,

Bob and Karen

A kid's perspective

2009-07-20T15:28:00.000-07:00

While we were in the hospital with my father-in-law, Kevin and Mikaya helped watch the kids at night and all day (bless them!). Well, they forgot Sophia’s blankie and she can’t function without it. George went up to the baby floor to see if he could get a receiving blanket to “fill in”. They found one and she loved it. So last night I sat down to pray with her and she was holding her blankie in her Sophia way and I told her the “Grampa’s blankie” story. She got this look on her face of pure sadness and just said “I don’t want Grandpa to be sick anymore.” So I told her how Grandpa watches over us from heaven’s window. Boy do we miss you Dad.

So, today as I found out the good news that my nephew is finally back in the states after being in Iraq for almost a year, I am still mourning my amazing father-in-law who also served our Country proud. Let us always say thank you to those who have served and remember how much they sacrificed for us. Let us also remember how God sacrificed His Son just so we could gain back our lives and our restore our relationship with him.

Faithfulness

2009-07-15T12:07:00.000-07:00

For we have heard of your faith in Christ Jesus and your love for all of God's people, which come from your confident hope of what God has reserved for you in heaven. You have had this expectation ever since you first heard the truth of the Good News. This same Good News that came to you is going out all over the world. It is bearing fruit everywhere by changing lives, just as it changed your lives from the day you first heard and understood the truth about God's wonderful grace. Colossians 1:4-6

Well, life has been - life. It has been a rough few months for the Raskell's, but with faith we have survived and we will continue. Early on May 8, 2009, we lost our beloved father, grandfather, husband, friend. We miss Jim/Dad/Grandpa so much, but we are so thankful he is Home with our true Father. So many blessings have come from this loss, and we hold to this. The family is close again, siblings are going to church, other siblings are thinking about it, and we are thankful he is not suffering. My father-in-law was such an amazing man. Words cannot truly describe him. He has 7 children, over 40 grandchildren, many great-grandchildren, a wife, and two dogs. He served in Vietnam proudly for the Air Force and continued his career in the Air Force after Vietnam. Every year he paid for all the grandkids to get haircuts and shoes for school. Every Christmas we had presents under the tree for ALL of us. He donated to many charities. He loved the Shock games and watching his grandkids play sports. There is a huge hole in our lives right now. Last year we were so thankful to hear he accepted Christ. We know he is looking through his window in heaven watching his grandkids grow and play and waiting for all of us to be reunited again.

We have also been praying for my father, Bob, who is suffering from a kidney disease and multiple other health problems from exposure during the Gulf War. His kidney disease has really set him back and we keep praying he gets better and back to his active self. I was so blessed to spend a couple of hours with him over the 4th of July on a mountain horse back ride.

The kids continue to grow and have fun with life. They are all at home with Dad this summer. He is still unemployed, but truly enjoying his time with the kids. I admit I am a little jealous. I am working for the Coeur d'Alene Tribe as their Project Engineer. I LOVE my job. It is so fun and different.

We are getting excited for Camp this year. It is our family time that we don't get much each year.

I am hoping to update more often. This last year has been a kicker for us, and I am praying and hopeful the rest of 2009 will be a little more calm. Well, as much as it can be with a family of 9!

Urgent prayer

2009-05-06T15:38:00.000-07:00

Please pray for my father-in-law, Jim. He is in ICU and not doing well. He has multiple complications from Vietnam. Please pray for him and our family and we struggle through this time. Above are pictures of him at Christmas Eve family night. He is such an amazing man. He love his family so much and does so much for him. Every Christmas Eve we get together and have dinner, we open presents he has bought for all of us (over 30 grandkids and great-grandkids), and just love on each other.

We love you DAD!!!!!

Wishing you a Magical Day!

2009-03-29T18:09:00.000-07:00

In February we received the most amazing blessing ever - a trip to Disneyworld for our whole family. It truly was a gift from God. Words cannot describe how amazing our journey was. We had VIP passes to get to the front of the lines for everything. We met Aerial, all the Superheros, Alice, Aurora, Sponge Bob, Squidworth, Mickey and Minnie, Mary Poppins, Mayor and Mrs. Clayton, Goofy, Pluto, Curious George, Rose Petal, and saw so many others. We rode roller coaster after roller coaster. Our favorites were Rock n Roller, Hulk, Space Mountain, Everest, and the Mummy. The best simulator - Simpsons. Men In Black was the best interactive. Sophia didn't do to well with ET or Spiderman 4D. Although, a private meeting with him was her favorite. We were splashed by Shamu, fed the penguins and George and I had a tour and met Fisher, a king penguin. We had ice cream the first and last thing of every day. We went on an African safari. Giovanni was in the Disaster movie, too!

Those were just highlights.

I will never forget the gift of Make-a-wish and Give Kids the World. My family has never been so happy as we were when we went to Florida as the Raskells Party of 10 (with the grandparents).

Here are some pictures of our trip. They are all over the place, but I just wanted to get them up before I got more comments about not having them!

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Update

2009-03-12T11:18:00.000-07:00

"Show me your ways O Lord, teach me your paths." Psalm 25:4

Just to update. I know it has been since December since I posted. Yes, I finally did get a job. I started work at the end of January. George is STILL unemployed. I am a little discouraged by it all, mostly the financial part. It gets kind of old not being able to pay bills! Yet, I am so thankful George is at home with the girls. Our house runs so much smoother with him home. He is so much more patient, organized and motivated than me. J

Not much has really happened, but here is a quick rundown. Nick is home from Butte. He has huge car issues and is trying to save up for getting it fixed. Kevin is still in school. George was in the hospital for a few days because of some clots in his lungs, but thankfully through meds he is better. We are working with the hospital now because he was 2 days away from getting insurance through my work. L Giovanni is working hard on a story he is submitting for a contest (sneak peak is he gets penguin feet). Caleb is being tested into the gifted kids program at school. Both boys are almost done with hockey. They had a tourney last weekend and each scored a goal or two! Ahnika is on her way to Seattle for her Dr. Ann appt. George is taking the girls (didn’t I say how cool he is). She is doing really well. Sophia is growing bigger and bigger and is slowly learning her numbers and letters. I am plugging away at work. Enjoying reading again, meeting with friends and finally reading my bible more regularly. I am currently studying the life of David. What a great story!

Our biggest news was our FREE trip to Disneyworld. I’ll post soon enough about the trip, but it was amazing. We received Make-a-Wish for Ahnika and she wished to play hockey with a princess. It was truly the best time I have ever had. Our WHOLE family got to go. It was so amazing. I will put together a slideshow of the trip once I finally get the pictures downloaded.

So just keep praying for our finances. We are struggling and honestly that is our biggest problem. Pray for wisdom with our work stuff and that God’s grace continues in our lives.

It's not about me, it is really about God

2008-12-27T14:35:00.000-08:00

"For I know the plans I have for you," says the LORD. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you," says the LORD. "I will end your captivity and restore your fortunes. I will gather you out of the nations where I sent you and will bring you home again to your own land." Jeremiah 29:11-14

God has opened my eyes so much over the last month. We have been so busy getting ready for Grandpa's Christmas eve party, getting kids to hockey, hanging with Malcom, school, snow, family, and looking for work. We are both still unemployed, but so thankful for God's provision through it all. We have had some serious struggles - don't get me wrong. There are days it is hard to get out of bed because of the "what is going to be different today?" But, overall we hold fast to God's promise to keep us cared for by His means and not our own. So, here is a quick update before I tuck kids in.

Malcom was here for all of November. It was awesome. He and his girlfriend, Natasha went back to Germany the beginning of December. He is moving off base in January and is pretty excited. He just got a new Hedgehog - Stuffa.

Nick is currently playing hockey for a Junior B team in Butte, MT. He is having fun. He is home on leave right now. What a different young man he is! It has been great hanging out with him and watching him mentor his younger siblings. They have been loving it. There are some pictures of him playing against Missoula in November.

Kevin is still going to school and is on break right now. He has been such a help around here with the kids. We call him Daddy Kevin. We have been enjoying him and Mikaya playing games. He is working nights now at UPS.

Giovanni and Caleb are playing hockey and loving it. They have gotten so good. There are some pictures playing in the rink and also downstairs with their new hockey set they got for Christmas. They got two extra days of school off for break because of the amount of snow we have gotten in the last two weeks. See below. Giovanni and I had a converstaion one day and it went like this: "I think God wants me to win this hand of War Gio." "No, I will win. (pause) Why do I do that?" "What?" I ask. "I always think about me. I never think about what God wants or others? Why do I do that?" He is so insightful! Don't we always do that? What I want, how I feel. Even when I am talking with God, it is all about me.

Ahnika and Sophia are funny to be around. Since we can't afford preschool for them anymore they sometimes get a little to "close" and I break up a lot of fights during the day. They are so cute to watch. The things they say are hilarious! "I am not talking you!" "Oh, man!" We have a lot of mommy Ahnika and baby Sophia talks all day, too!

George and I are still looking for work. It gets really frustrating to continue with nothing in sight. We just are hopefull for God's will to happen soon! We have both been taking care of his father and getting ready for the big Christmas Eve Raskell party. I have wrapped probably over 500 presents, baked, shopped, and driven then to multiple places. There are pictures below. He buys all the grandkids, great-grandkids and kids presents every year for our traditional get together. It is full of love, food, cookies, and gifts. I love it and the chaos!

We have had record snow in the last week. In about 36 hours Spokane got between 2 to 3 feet of snow and it has continuously snowed for the last week. Our 4' fence is almost buried in our front yard. I have never seen so much snow before. It has been fun watching the kids try to play in it. We went sledding at Whitneys last week. It was so fun! It is starting to warm up and melt so i am curious to see what happens with 4' of snowmelt. Flooding!

We had a great Christmas and the kids and I have been enjoying game time and family time. For the first time ever I don't have cable and I love it! We have spent so much more time together!

Well, time for kids to get to bed for hockey and church in the morning.

Love to you all!

Here is a collection of our life in the last couple of months.

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

God's Church

2008-11-17T15:49:00.000-08:00

All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord's Supper*), and to prayer. A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord's Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity—all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved. Acts 2:42-47

How many of have ever really thought about what "God's Church" is? I always said the blanket "Fellowship with other believers, discipleship, blah, blah, blah." You know, I never really understood what I talked about.

For the last 6 weeks my husband and I have really seen what "God's Church" is. As you know, my awesome hubby lost his job. Well, 4 days later, I lost mine. Within one week our lives were completely uprooted, turned upside down, and we would finally learn and understand faith, hope, trust and love in God. I was devastated when I found out we were both unemployed. What about bills, health insurance, the kids, food, life? I hyperventilated. I cried. I screamed (um, yeah, crazy woman in her truck at a park screaming). I questioned God "WHY? How could you do this do us?!?!?!" I was angry, depressed, everything. I found emotions I never knew existed. Yet, underneath it all has truly been a peace I could never have found on my own.

This peace I have is not from me. Only God can give it. It is the peace and the joy Paul is always talking about. I still worry, and cry, and stress, and lose patience, get angry, etc. I just can't explain it. We still have no jobs, we are completely broke with no mortgage, electricity, cars, etc paid for, we lose insurance in about 2 weeks, yet, somehow God's love is still in me. The bad of this is not Him, but the peace and joy is. I love God more now than before. I LOVE staying at home with the girls. I love fixing dinner and eating BEFORE 6. I know it will be short lived and soon (hopefully) I will return to work. Until then I praise God I am where I am.

So, back to God's church. You always hear about how "Did you hear about that person that helped that other person?" Well we have received so much in the last month I just can't describe how I feel. I am overwhelmed with gratitude and love for everyone who has prayed and helped. You are all awesome.

So far we have gotten gas money, childcare money, costco gift cards, olive garden gift card, a free awesomely comfy leather couch, food, food, and more food. We couldn't have done it with the help and prayers of others. I can't wait till this chapter of trials is over, but for now I thank God for what we do have. So many others out there don't.

I leave you with this little story from sweet Sophia. Tonight I asked her "What are you thinking?" She answered "Gawd." I ask, "What about God?" "How he make aminals (yes that is spelled right) and he make ME!" I love her! She is so in love with Jesus and God. Everytime a worship song comes on she raises her hands and says "Praise Jesus!"

Caleb and Gio playing hockey for the first time! Oh, Nick made the Junior League Hockey Team in Butte! Good job!
George's birthday party! Happy er um 40 something?
He is the best husband ever!
Happy Halloween!
Family pictures at Camp this summer!

Updates and Prayers needed

2008-09-25T12:15:00.000-07:00

I can do all things in Christ who strengthens me. Phil 4:13

Wow, has it seriously been over a month since I posted? So much has gone on, but I want to start with the greatest need from all of you - prayer.

Tuesday morning, after working from 10 pm till 5 am to get a job done at work, my awesome hubby was informed he was being laid off. He has been at the company for 3 years. We worked together. As you can imagine this has hit us hard. 6 kids, two adults, one income? What GOD? However, God is GOOD - ALL THE TIME and I know this is the start of some amazing blessings. We don't know yet what those are, but they are there. Please just pray for protection in our family and marriage and that my hubby keeps up a good outlook. There are so many bonuses to him having a few months off, so this is a good thing (once we figure out our finances). We have decided mac n cheese and top ramen were good in college, they should be ok for now. I feel bad for him, because his bday is Monday. He has had a lot of bad things happen on his birthday in the past so he was a little sad to see this happen. I am so proud of how he has handled this all. I came home to dinner, laundry folded, my messy desk clean and his amazing smile. Also please pray for me as I have to go to work and most likely be the brunt of gossip and "oh poor her" looks. It is hard.

So, what else is going on? Malcom is coming in about a month for a month (praise GOD). Kevin and Mikaya (Kev's girlfriend) were baptized at the end of August (Praise Jesus). We had an amazing time at camp. School has started and the boys are loving it. Kevin is back in school - finally. He stayed at home with the boys all summer and definitely needed a break from the house! Nick is working hard and saving people from work! I am so incredibly proud of his faith and love for the Lord. I got to spend an amazing weekend with 200 other women from our church on a retreat. OH, we finally readopted the 4 littles ones.

Well, I have to go walking with a friend. Please just pray for us. I will add pictures soon! Here is one from the readoption.

At the Seattle Aquarium with Malchi's girlfriend Natasha.

Prayer for a family

2008-08-14T12:15:00.000-07:00

Please pray for my friends family. There was a huge car accident that took the life of one and has seriously hurt many others. Here is her blog to learn more about it.

http://bedlamatthebradshaws.blogspot.com/

Latest on the Fam

2008-08-11T12:26:00.000-07:00

Sophia's "Pee-pee Party" for the first night she went all day on the potty!
Ahnika with big sis' Michelle. These two are inseparable when she visits!
Isn't she a sweet baby?
Ahnika loves to go under water. She is a little fish.
These guys crack me up in the pool. How is it we have gone two years with only a broken collar bone and 5 stiches. You would think with 4 boys we would have more!

We have been so busy lately with kids, work, family, urg! Where does time go. The boys are loving having Kev watch them this summer. They go to the free movies, water slides, pool, trampoline, the mall, video games, etc. Of course, after chores, reading and work books. I am still a mom you know! The girls LOVE their new "school". They sing songs, quote stories from the bible, their tempers are better, and the biggest news - Sophia is potty trained! Yeah!

Our biggest news, however, is there is another Christ follower in our home. Kevin accepted Christ while being a leader at our churches middle school camp. I wasn't there, but George was there to share with him. He gets baptized on August 24 and his girlfriend Mikaya is the weekend before. This was such an answer to prayer. We have been praying for years for him. I can't wait to see what God does with him!

We head off to Camp in the next couple of weeks. I am so excited! We are spending a few days in Seattle before Camp. We went last year to camp and it was awesome. They have counselors for each of kids and so we get free time most of the day. It is such a blessing. Plus I get to see and meet some other adoptive families I have known through email.

We just keep plugging away at life. Some days are easier than others, for sure. But in the end, who could have asked for a better life than what God has given us. We also just got news from a friend that my Ethiopian boys' grandmothers are doing well. George and I are praying for the opportunity to travel there next year to visit them and to visit all of our other dear friends. I miss Ethiopia. Ahnika's grandmother sent us a beautiful dress and scarf for her. I am so blessed to have the children I have. God gave me the sweetest things in the world. I get so stressed some times, but then I really do try to sit back and realize, this is so short and I just need to enjoy EVERY moment. Even the tantrums, smart mouths, $0 balance checking account, mac n cheese for dinner - again, yelling, dogs barking, laughter filled, smiles, tears, accidents, hockey games, trampoline, water wars, nerf dart wars, spilled juice, etc. etc. are all gifts from God, and I need to enjoy them.

We live in such a society that breeds being the best, the fastest, the prettiest, the richest, etc. But really, why should we? Does it really change the outcome of our lives? God's design was not for that. I want to be simple with my life and to get rid of this flesh once and for all. But it cries out for more and more. What if I had nothing, like my little kids' families? What if I had to dig through the garbage for tomatoes like Caleb did at the age of 3? Or walk a mile a day to the market to sell potatos like Giovanni did at the age of 4? And I whine because I wish I had more money. I am shameful. God, give me the grace to love what I lack and embrace humbleness. When will it all be enough that we finally say - get rid of it all! I pray soon. My heart breaks as hear more and more about the famine in Ethiopia. What will become of my children's birth families? How can I help them? What about the disease that is destroying a nation? What can we do to help?

I know I will be praying for the famine, HIV/AIDS, my kids' birthfamilies, my family, and all of our future. There is so much more we can do. Lets stand together to do this!

Our friends are home!

2008-08-10T22:00:00.000-07:00

Today my friends came home with their newest adopted daughter from Ethiopia. Last year they adopted 3 kids from Ethiopia. Their first adopted daughter was from the same orphanage as Ahnika. It was is such a blessing to have been their to see their whole family reunited. They now have 11 kids total. The older kids watched all the kids while they were gone. I am so thankful they all survived. Here are some pictures from the airport. Their new daughter is so beautiful. Please pray for them as they transition back into life and for their new daughter to enter into her new family.

Welcome Home friends!

2008-07-22T07:19:00.000-07:00

Please pray for my dear friend and her little girl in Ethiopia. I was with Carolyn last year in Ethiopia while we picked up our children. We stayed at the guest house together (she adopted 3 siblings and her hubby was there with her). I was there the day she met Y for the first time.

Y is extremely sick. She is vomiting, can’t keep her medicines down, has pneumonia, parasites and only weighs 30 lbs. She is about 10 years old. She was in the hospital but C didn’t think it was helping. Please pray for God’s hand to sustain her until she can get home. She is waiting for her Visa from the embassy. They are trying to expedite it.

Here is her blog http://www.twietconfetti.blogspot.com/

Also, please pray for AAI’s Ghana program. They were attacked by thieves and one of the workers was raped. You can read about it here http://www.fullhousehandshearts.typepad.com/

I have been broken over all that is going on lately. I hear of these stories and I get so angry that I can’t go over and help. But, then last night while working on my devotions, I had a complete peace in my heart. I realized that no matter where I go, what I do good or bad, or when, God is always with me. He is always there to pick me up, to comfort me, to encourage me, sustain me, love me, and discipline me. God is there with my friend and He is there in Ghana. As my pastor said (paraphrased from memory) in church a couple of weeks ago, “Suffering we go through shows us the depths of God’s love”. This is so true.

So let us all be on our knees for my friend and those children and nannies in Ghana. Remember God’s grace, mercy and love for them. Know that we are safe in Him.

Forever and ever day

2008-07-17T12:25:00.000-07:00

Then Moses went down to the people and repeated all the instructions and regulations the LORD had given him. All the people answered with one voice, "We will do everything the LORD has commanded." Exodus 24:3

I admit, I am an emotional wreck. For two years I have either been in Ethiopia or travelling to Ethiopia. Now, this year I watch two close friends leave for Ethiopia. I am so longing to go (not to adopt, mind you) and feel Ethiopia all over again. For those of you who have been there, you know what I am talking about. The sounds, smells, heat, love, emotions, rawness, sights, etc. I miss it terribly. For those of you who haven't been, go. Follow God's call and go with Him. It is the most beautiful place I have been. I am so thankful we did as He asked us to do when we adopted.

July 18, 2006 - We landed in the US with all eight of us. Dad, mom, Kev, Nick, Malchi, Gio, Caleb and Sophia - Raskell party of 8. We were exhausted, hungry, grumpy, overwhelmed, and I was in love. God was so gracious to our family. He knew what we needed. For the last two years I have watched each one of my children grow into amazing kids. Malchi is over in Germany serving our Country. Kevy is ministering to our boys and caring for them this summer (of course tying them to a tree isn't really ministry, but they think it is hilarious). Nick is ON FIRE for God. He has youth pastor written all over him. We are so proud of him! Gio is so smart. I am amazed at the things he knows. He is always thinking. He is my little man. Caleb, sweet Caleb, is our handful. He is always laughing and getting in trouble. His heart is huge and he makes me smile when I think of him. Sweet Sophia, my baby. She is so FUN! I can't believe how awesome (if not patience building) it is to watch a two year old learn. She is hilarious to watch. She has a fetish for flip flops. So if you come visit and wear them in our house, the will become permanent fixtures on her feet. We have all grown so much in the last two years.

July 18, 2007 - I leave early in the morning for Ethiopia by myself to DC where I meet with my mama. How awesome my mom got to be there to see the "birth" of our 7th child? God asked us to follow Him to Ethiopia one more time to bring home this girl who stole my husbands heart on July 14, 2006 while in Ethiopia. We met this little sweet while bringing donations to her orphanage. All I could think - um no way jose - 3 new ones is enough! I guess when we try to put our will in front of His, we get our hands slapped! So, I left to get her. My husband is so gracious to let me do this and he stayed home with all the others. This journey was even more special because my mom was there. God was there with us every step of the way. From meeting Gio's grandma, to meeting new friends and seeing old ones, I will never forget this journey. Ahnika has grown so much since we first brought her home. She was a hard one to handle in the transition. God has such a plan for her - I can see it in her. She is truly special to me.

July 18, 2008 - Tomorrow we our going to go to the lake for a picnic and then get a Gooey's ice cream (fabulous if you are ever in Coeur d'Alene) to celebrate our family. I might pull out some gifts we bought for them.

Words cannot express the love I have for each of my children. From the oldest to the youngest they are all mine. I can't believe that God chose me - crazy emotional me - to raise them. Why me? I ask so many times. What can I give them? Love? Is ever enough? I pray for them constantly. I pray for any other kids God is preparing for us. I really don't think this is the end. I just am thankful we get a break this year!

We had a chance to speak at a conference last week about adopting and special needs adoptions. It brought back all the emotions of adopting seeing these families and hearing their words and questions. I pray for peace and wisdom with all families wanting to adopt. It is a hard process, but SO worth it in the end.

Here our some pictures from each journey!

This is the first time together as the 8 of us! This is the first time we met the three little ones.

This is sweet Hannah with the three little ones. Look how small they are!

This is our friends at the Addis Kidan Guest House with the three little ones. This is me and grandma with our fourth addition!Our complete family when I arrived back in Spokane.We were actually picking cherries last Saturday but two little guys got attacked by two big guys!
This was taken at Ahnika's first bday in America. She had just had her "belly button" made. She had an umbilical hernia and she is 3 days post-op and proud of her new "belly button"!

Caleb playing hockey. We are truly a hockey family. When asked what she wanted to be when she grew up, Ahnika very matter-of-factly said "A hockey player." Daddy was so proud!

Gio was concentrating so hard! They did great their first year of playing. No games yet, but we are only about 2 months away from the season starting!

These two are perfect for each other. It is God's gift to see how well they get along. If one cries, the other cries too. They are always hugging, kissing, holding hands, and oh, fighting over toys. Perfect!

Crisis in Ethiopia

2008-06-12T12:47:00.000-07:00

I am not here today to write about my family but their families suffering in Ethiopia. There has been a drought for months in Ethiopia and now they are facing massive food shortages. My friend can't afford to buy apples or carrots. Corn has tripled in price. Children are dying. I am so saddened by what I see. I pray for the safety of Giovanni's grandmother, aunts, uncles, half brother. Or Caleb's family who I have yet to meet. Please join me in prayer for Ethiopia and all the other countries facing food crisis. Watch this video to see what they are facing.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/in_depth/7444998.stm

Let us be the Josephs (Gen 41:54-57) of the world and save those in need during the times of famine. We have plenty so why should we not help those who don't.

Wow, has it been that long

2008-04-28T12:34:00.000-07:00

Wow! Has it really been that long since I posted? Life is beautifully crazy. We are getting ready for a fun summer of camping, Seattle, swimming, camps, etc. I can't believe we still are getting snow! Will it ever end!

Everyone is doing well. The boys are getting so big and the girls are definitely fitting their age. Sophia has tantrums about every 10 mins. Ahnika is still trying to figure out where she fits in. Hockey starts this week for Caleb and Gio. They are pretty excited. We are hoping to get Ahnika into dance for a little this summer.

I don't have much time left after work, kids, house, family, church, etc. for much internet. But, pictures are helpful to see the progress. Just know we are all where we are supposed to be and God is amazing gracious to us!

Enjoy!

Mommy and Ahnika at Spagetti Factory
Mommy and Sophia at Spagetti Factory.
Giovanni was Student of the Month! Yeah!
Crazy hair day for school.

She cracks me up! I love this age.
Ahnika and her new bike. She hasn't quite yet learned how to pedal.
Nick and Whitney for Prom plus a few cute extras. Kev and Mikaya's I haven't downloaded yet. They just went this weekend.
This is our new puppy Peyton sporting Sophia's pajama top.
I had the priveledge of seeing Mark Schultz in concert with my 3 "daughters" and a friend. It was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO awesome! He is an amazing performer. Go see him!

What is in a title?

2008-03-05T12:31:00.000-08:00

And being found in a fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross. Phil 2:8

I didn't know what to title this, but does it matter? Hopefully people read this anyway. :)

Not much knew is going on. Our son Malcom surprised us from Germany a couple of weeks ago. What a surprise blessing. He is back home in Germany and we are back to missing him. 5 more years, 5 more years. :(

We got a new dog. She is so sweet, even if she likes to run away. She has definitely made our house busy - again.

Life is good, busy, and packed with love. I was talking with my bible study on Monday about my "older" boys and the "younger" boys. I asked them if it is wrong to have your 7 yr old and 6 yr old sit on their big brothers shoulders and "chicken fight" in the mall like they are in the pool. They seemed to think it would be better than to be a boring, strict, no fun family. Well that is DEFINITELY not us. Do you think it is wrong our girls have tiaras, earrings, and phones? Thanks Malchi! They love it!

The boys continue to amaze me with their reading and math. They are so smart! I just wish their family and friends in Ethiopia could see how smart they are. Ahnika continues to amaze me with her language and smart brain. Do you know that at 3 1/2 she has comprehension of what being poor is? We were in Target weeks ago and she asked me "Mommy, I not poor anymore?" It broke my heart that she knew what it means to be poor. Then I realize what a blessing it is to fully understand what it means to go without. I will, prayerfully, never have to know the deep harshness this world offers. My 3 little children will hopefully always appreciate the blessings God has given them.

I pray our little one will learn this appreciation as she can't remember her life before our home. Yet, constantly repeating to them the Love of Christ, to have Him in your heart, to love your friends, to be sorry and humble by our actions, and to teach them about God will keep her humble. Yesterday we were walking through our neighborhood when a car drove by with loud "rap" music. There was some derrogatory language in it and I heard the car flip around. My mom radar went up, but of course he was only parking. Yet when he parked and turned the car off Sophia yelled as loud as possible in her 2 yr old voice "JESUS COME TO MY HEART! JESUS!" as she looked to the sky. Wow! They do listen and I pray that man will someday open his heart to Jesus.

Today I am humbled again to the life God has blessed me with. My heart is bursting with the love I have for my awesome, drop-dead gorgeous hubby, ALL my kids, my friends, my family, and most importantly MY GOD! I have friends in Ethiopia picking up their new children. I received an email from one of them and my heart ached to be on a plane back there. I miss my friends and my new family there, the people, the food, the culture, God's presence, the coffee. If you can - go there. You will forever be changed.

Here is a picture of Sophia's birthday.

Thank you to all my friends and family. Thank you for sharing your lives with me. I can't imagine being anywhere else in life. You are all blessings to me and I love you dearly. Be in Christ in all you do - daily - seeking Him and loving Him just as He loves you.

What will you do with your rebate?

2008-02-08T12:36:00.000-08:00

So, we are getting a rebate in May. My mind was already planning on how to spend it: playset for the kids, clothes, christmas presents, fence, etc. Then I read a friend's hubby's blog at http://musicbykeith.blogspot.com/ and I started thinking. So we get a few thousand, but what has Jesus really taught me about money. Didn't he tell us the parable of how the master gave 3 men 3 different wages to see what they would do with them (see Matthew 25:14-30). One invested and doubled his return, the second did the same, the third hid it away and got nothing out of it. So, I had to realize, how do I want to invest it? Yes, a play area would be great for the kids, but what about their Ethiopian friends who have no water, or food, or shelter? What about them? Should my selfish heart give up on them? What better investment that to help others. So, my hubby and I decided to give to the following places:

AHOPE - http://www.ahopeforchildren.org/
Heifer.org - http://www.heifer.org/
1000 wells (or my friends blog)- http://musicbykeith.blogspot.com

AHOPE is and HIV orphanage in Ethiopia. These sweeties are adoptable and sponsorable. For $30 a month, your money pays for the meds the children need to survive. HIV is a manageable disease. It is not the death sentence the world once thought as long as medication and treatment is available. These kids are the sweetest kids. I have had the priveledge to hang out with them a lot. I can't wait to go back and see them again. So far, there have been over 25 kids that have been adopted in the US from AHOPE.

Heifer.org is an organization my friend KT told me about. You basically buy a cow for a family to use. I plan on researching this more.

1000 wells. I believe for $3000 a well can be dug. So, as K points out, 5 families at $600 each pays for a new well. I'm game!

So, when you get your check in May, think of who you can help. Here is a picture from Soddo, Ethiopia where my boys are from. They could use your help.

Nothing big, just life

2008-02-02T15:59:00.000-08:00

Life is as usual out of control. Eventhough I stress, yell, cry, get sad, worried, etc. I love every minute of my life. What 30 something has 7 kids at home, 1 in Germany, another big kid for a hubby, 5 cats, 2 dogs, a small house, a truck without 4 wheel drive in the worst Spokane winter ever, 4 bibles (did we forget some people can't even have one?), cameras, tvs, a job, a computer, cubboards of food, etc. I stress so much, but God is graceful and merciful, but most importantly - gentle. He loves to gently remind me of His provisions when it is time to pay bills. He reminds me when I am not praying or getting in the Word. Today I was reading my "bible in a year" book (I am only about 7 days behind), when I came across this "God replied, 'I AM the one who always is. Just tell them "I AM has sent me to you." Ex 3:14 God is always and is I AM. He continues to provide for all of us. I praise him for the blessings he has given me.

January is always a hard month for us and I am sure many others. Holidays are over, it is my birthday, so I get older, we are broke and it is STILL winter! I just have to hold strong that spring is coming!

We have had snow days for the first time in a long time. We have gotten a lot of snow lately. It was a crazy week. This has been the snowiest winter since I moved here 9 yrs ago. It is actually closer to Montana winters which I love. Well, until our 4 wheel drive truck lost its 4 wheel drive. It is a little scarier to drive now. :) Not much else to say. We did get our first stiches with the little ones. Apparently a hockey stick to the ear without a helmet can cut your ear bad enough to get 4 stiches. Poor Caleb. It is all healed now!

Here is a little video of Sophia singing "happy birthday". She is obsessed with it and sings it everyday. It is so cute! A light does come on during the filming so you can see her.

Here are some pictures of my birthday and fun times. We ate at IHOP (remember, kids eat free with each paying adult, unless it is all-you-can-eat pancakes and your teens get that) and the older boys made it to 14 pancakes. Mmmm.

Here is the gang minus Malchi at IHOP.

This one is for you Malchi. I am trying to upload the video, but I am having Youtube probs.

I love watching Nick and Kev play hockey. This is Nick. See the 'C'. He is the Captain!

This is what happens when your daughter falls 1 foot onto the floor from her bed. This happens a lot!

Heart for Ethiopia

2008-01-21T12:27:00.000-08:00

While in Ethiopia we stayed at the Addis Kidan Baptist Guest House. The couple that runs the house Ray and Lauralee are in the finals for an Ebay give away. Go to my friend Lisa's blog to find out more.

http://www.abushel-and-apeck.blogspot.com/

Please vote (I believe she is the 2nd from the left - she is the older woman against a brick wall).

Christmas, New Years, Whatever!

2008-01-01T22:59:00.000-08:00

Christmas Eve Service. Aren't they cute? The older boys were at their moms.

Christmas morning.

Giovanni made this snowman. We have had a lot of snow this year. It has been awesome!

Aren't those robes the cutest? THese girls love to jump.

This is our New Year's Dinner. Homemade Ethiopian. The Shiro Wat was a little too spicy for me, but I tamed it with the Iab and my version of Doro Tibs. It was really good.

A quick update and then I am off to bed. We have been crazy busy with "the Holidays". Christmas was insane - Hmmm 12 people in one little living room - 4 of them little ones who have only celebrated none to one time in their short little lives? Yes, crazy. Awesome. Beautiful. Amazing. Blessed! Within 5 minutes of sitting down to open presents we heard "But, I didn't want a scooter, I wanted a skateboard." And "Is it Ahnika's turn yet?" "Mine!" Ahhh, so their little minds forget where they came from. :) We spent the day (and week) with my parents and my grandma. It was so nice to have them hear, but I must say, they are probably glad to get back to their beds! New Year's eve was fireworks, sparkling cider, games, and fun. Today we hung out and let the kids be LOUD for most of the afternoon. It is great to sit back and enjoy your children playing, laughing, and being kids. God knew what he was doing when He hand picked each child for us. I get so stressed so often with time, money, work, kids, dogs, messes, etc. that I forget that it is all so temporary and my life will be over soon. What legacy do I really want to leave? A stressed out teen? A poor son? Or a lost soul? So, I plan to focus on what I am to live for. Jesus. I mean he is the reason why we are all here, right?

I met this girl who is awesome. She has been through so much in her life. I was writing a letter to her about life when it really struck that I am so good at telling others about God and what He does for us, but I never really believed it. I never believed that he really loves me no matter what. Even when I lose it on my hubby, or I break a promise, or gossip, or criticize, or judge, He still sees me as a beautiful woman full of love and compassion. He gave so much up for me. And He would have done it just for me - just for one person He still would have sent His son. How awesome is that.

So, I reflect on my life and this last year. I have gained so much in my life, I don't EVER want to look back. I will try to look forward - to run the race He has planned and keep my eyes on Jesus (read Hebrews 13 for this passage - it rocks!).

Have a great 2008!

Monsters and Bean Burritos

2007-12-06T12:22:00.000-08:00

So, I know I am terrible at posting lately. I have cut back my internet time and focused more on the kids. Yeah for us, sorry for you all.

Life has been great. We are definitely getting into a groove and I feel about 50% back. I still struggle with sleep, organizing, and meshing with all the new stuff. By this time next year, I may consider this again. :)

Ahnika is really focused on monsters lately. Of course when your older brothers constantly scare you that "The monster gonna eat your toes", or baby, or dog, or insert item. I took her to Princess Wishes - Disney on Ice and Malificent the bad witch in Sleeping Beauty scared her. We had such a ball watching the event. She was in awe of it all. I will post pictures soon. So Tues we go to Target and I ask her where she got her owies. "A monster at school." So, two questions - Who is the bully picking on my kid" or "Wow, what an imagination!" I think it is the later. Along with monsters her other favorite thing is princesses. Everything pink or purple is for princesses. It is cute.

Sophia is doing well. Her words are expanding greately! I can't believe it. She really loves to color and has finally learned to ask to color. Our walls are now multi-colored because of her. She is just my heart and I smile when I think of her and her little voice saying "I know know!" for I don't know.

Giovanni amazes me all the time. He is really starting to come out of his shell. He is doing great at school. Last night we were talking about Star Wars while in line at the grocery store. He was asking about the "guy that look like a bean burrito". We determined he meant Jaba the Hut. Kids and their imagination.

Caleb is still a little hyper boy. He is just always having fun. He loves to tickle, wrestle and laugh. His math skills are great. He has also become quite the tehter ball pro at school.

Nick is doing good. Enjoying life I guess without a job. But looking. He is really getting back into church which we love and in a way continues to mature.

Kevin is still in school and work. He has become quite the babysitter for us. It has been great!

Malcom is in Germany still. He has been nominated to attend the Air Force Academy so he is working on that. He is hoping to come home for a visit soon. I miss him somethin' fierce. George and Kev went to Florida to visit him in the beginning of November.

I will try to post pictures soon. I miss blogging, but I will say, my family doesn't miss me blogging!

Here are the kids before their first sledding of the year. Ahnika loved it!

This is the director from Ahnika's orphanage. She was in Seattle from Ethiopia and we drove over for a visit. Ahnika was so happy to see her! She misses "Mama Sidisse" so much.

Life

2007-10-26T12:22:00.000-07:00

My heart breaks for what others have to endure in life. I know we are all where we are to be. I was to be born in America so I could adopt my children, have my husband, and raise my older kids. I know this, but my strength is weak when I hear or see what other people endure.

I have been to Ethiopia twice now. The first time was hard for reality. The second even harder. Then I read my dear friends blog this morning about her journey in Ethiopia. There has to be something we can do.

http://starbelliedsneaths.blogspot.com/

The other color blue...

2007-10-25T12:37:00.000-07:00

I had such an awesome weekend this last week. I was blessed with not just one family member visiting but FOUR! My Aunt and Uncle flew up from Athens, Georgia last Thursday and my mommy and grandma came up Friday. We had such a busy weekend with dinners, apple and pumpkin picking, shopping, watching pictures, Ahnika's dedications, and lots and lots of visiting. It was so fun! My aunt and uncle are the coolest people ever. It was so awesome to get to know them and see Christ in them. My aunt went with me to bible study and my uncle went with my hubby for middle school youth group. Amazing. My mom made her wonderful apple crisp and applesauce and we ALL enjoyed it. She is such a great cook. They all spoiled us and loved on us. I just wish we all lived closer.

The kids continue to amaze me. Sophia has actually gone twice in the potty. She is so close to being potty trained! They constantly color - or as Sophia says "Blu! Blu!" We have pen marks, crayon marks and marker marks all over! Last night we were blessed with free tickets (did I tell you how much stuff my hubby wins off the radio) to go see Dan in Real Life. It was a good movie. Our 20 yr old watched all 4 little ones and did great. Only Ahnika has pen marks ALL over. :)

We celebrated Ahnika's "3 yr" birthday. We actually are changing her birthday so she is 6 months older, but I needed an excuse to get George to his surprise birthday party. It was fun and he was surprised.

Life continues on in busy-ville. George and Kev are heading to Florida next week to

visit with Malcom. I wish I could go, but finances just won't allow to buy 8 plane tickets. I pray he makes it here for Thanksgiving before going overseas. It has almost been a year since he left, but honestly it seems forever. I miss him very much and I am FINALLY seeing how my parents felt after I left. It is the hardest thing to say goodbye to your child as they grown. I want them to all live with us forever!

God continues to amaze me at His provisions for us. He is so awesome and I am grateful to serve Him. May His blessings and glory be in your lives, too.

Goofy guys at the best restaurant ever - The White House Grill. Mmmmmm! And Daddy playing with his girls.

Birthday party!

Ahnika's dedication. I was just a wee bit nervous.

She is so funny! She loved the apples and was proud of "my apple".

My uncle won the best bite picture.

George says "HI"

Ahnika is such a ham.

Gamma and Sophia after pumpkin picking.

Could I have anything more perfect?

2007-10-17T07:41:00.000-07:00

How did God give me such wonderful blessings? Why me? Why do I get the priveledge to live in America, have an awesome (if not dirty) house, a great job, the most wonderful husband and 7+ a few extra kids? We talked about this in bible study on Monday night. My heart aches so often when I think about how I was picked to have this life. My boys were telling me a few days ago how they would watch people be buried. They are 6 and 7! Why did they have to watch their parents die and be buried.

Then I realize that God knows. He knows why I am where I am. I should be content with my life and cut out the "if onlys". I am such a worry stress case (ask my hubby, he would agree). I continually pray to release this worry. God has always provided my means and most importantly - my life. I cannot wait to get to Heaven and have the knowledge and understand of why life happened the way it did. For now I can hold to His knowledge and that He and He alone knows what is best. Rather than trusting my husband, kids or job to provide all I need, I have to remember He will - always.

Life has been crazy for us. I don't have much time for much more than playing with kids, cooking, cleaning and working. I love our life. It is so FUN! Ahnika is doing great. Her tantrums are so much less. She has moments of thinking it is not fair or whining, but she is doing great. Her and Sophia are priceless to watch.

The boys are hitting it hard at school. They continue to amaze me at how much they know! They are starting to read so well, and learn math, and time. They love school. We did get our first "bad choices" notice from the school counselor. Apparently Caleb pushed a little kid to far with teasing, the kid shoved him, Caleb's best friend shoved the other kid and then next thing you know - 8 kids in a kicking and hitting battle. Needless to say, they all lost recess the next day. Boys.

My Aunt and Uncle are coming in this week to visit and meet the kids. I haven't seen them in years and I am so excited. My mom and grandma are also coming up for the weekend! Yeah! We are going to go apple and pumpkin picking and eat lots of caramel apples.

Here are some pictures of our crazy kids. The one above was the girls (Sophia on the left) who HAD to wear their Ethiopian princess dresses. I was trying to pack to go to Montana, but we got side tracked.

Ahnika is such a little lover to Sophia. She is a great big sis. We were having a Spongue Bob puppet night.
Giovanni sporting his Ethiopian hat. Goofball.
Did I tell you they were crazy? The girls cannot seem to keep their shirts on. Sophia and Caleb are having an intense conversation on the phones. My sister-in-law got Ahnika the coolest little phone system for her birthday. They have fun.
Goofy and Crazy.

Pure joy

2007-09-05T10:44:00.000-07:00

This is from camp this last weekend. George and I walked up while Nick and Gio were playing baseball. It was a parents dream to see this bond.

Or this bond. Kevin loves his little Sophia so much. To bad she only calls everyone Nick or Ahnika (or sounds like Nee and Ahnka).

Ahhhhh! Help!

This was our trip home. We (except George) slept the first 3 hours and then it was the beautiful chaos again. Dancing, screaming, singing. It was fun.

Ahnika gets the funniest looks on her face!

This video was taken at about 1 am after arriving at camp. The girls are now into dancing.

Did I ever tell you we slide down our steep steps? Well, we tried with a laundry basket, but 1 hurt knee and goosehead later, we moved up to the sled. Who knew a 43 yr old man would do it.

Being a mom is the best thing in the world. Third to being a child of God and a wife to my wonderful hubby. Last week I ended up in the hospital with Ahnika for pheumonia. It sucked, but thankfully she is better. I feel really tested the last couple of months, but Thank YOU God for these trials. Without them life would be nothing and there would be no meaning. After visiting Ethiopia again, my perspective has changed and I just want a simple, no stress life. That is utterly impossible with my attitude, but I can definitely pray for a change in attitude. Our God is so amazing - truly. Everyday is enjoyment and I know I will learn something new.

Last week I heard some of these things:

"Mom, how come you never drink water like we do?" As I open my diet Mountain Dew.

"Mom, you eat a lot." Really, you think? I mean, I didn't get this size by not eating. :)

"Mom! That car is fishing." As the tow truck pulls the car up to a broken down car.

My sweet Little Miss (Ahnika) is fitting in so well. She loves to sing, dance, play and just cuddle. She started pre-school yesterday. She did goo and was excited to go back (well, into it was actually there). Today the boys started 1st grade. I didn't get to see them as I had an appointment, but hopefully there is pictures.

Life is getting more into control and organization. I pray daily for peach, and i know it will come. Enjoy the video and pictures.

Updates and life

2007-08-24T12:58:00.000-07:00

Where to begin. The last couple of weeks have been C-R-A-Z-Y! I never thought adding another child would change things so much. Little miss Ahnika (previously known as Nafkot) definitely has regulated our lives. We actually live on a schedule - meal times, nap times, bed times, etc. If we don't follow this we get big tantrums. She has done so well here, really. I think it more me trying to adjust. I am just exhausted! The first time around we had so many people bring us meals, help out, etc. but for some reason this time around it was different. We have made it through the hard part - the first month. On Monday we will have been home for 4 weeks. Boy has time flown. Here is a list of what we have been doing:

1. One trip to the doctor for regular visit. - He thinks things look good.

2. Next day a trip to the Dermatologist to treat her molluscum. They give her a treatment that will cause blisters and then h0pefully the virus will die. Poor thing, when they say blisters they really mean blisters. She had about 10 bandaids on for days. I felt so bad. I was definitely feeling like the worst mother EVER (of course wait till you read on).

3. Next day me, hubby and the 4 Ethiopian children loaded up in the car to drive to Seattle to see a doctor there. The visit went great. We only had one melt down at radiology. She did great on the blood draw.

4. Next day we go to the zoo. I almost missed out with Ahnika because she was throwing a tantrum (like now because it is nap time). Thankfully she calmed down and we had a great day. That afternoon on the way home, we got a call that she is Hep A positive. This is the "good" Hep to have. Of course, what is really a "good" Hep? We will talk to the Health Deptartment next week to find out what we have to do.

5. Next day we head downtown for kids day. We got faces painted, free stuff, suckers, candy, and PIZZA from Rocky Rococos. Mmmmm.

6. Next day we went to Cat Tales. It is a little zoo here to help rescue big cats and bears. It was so much fun. Caleb, Gio and Kev got their faces painted. The whole family and girlfriends went with us.

7. That night we ended up in the ER with Ahnika for a staff infection from one of the molluscum. Apparently if you leave a band-aid on a lot, bacteria will grow in the hurt area. Bad mom moment #2. We got home about 1:30 am with her still awake.

8. Two days later we had SOphia's 18 month check up and a follow up with Ahnika. Things are looking better.

9. Next day - the worst moment in my history - I was changing Sophia and reach down to get her pants. At the same time, she did. She fell. Hard. Her face hit the drawer. She screams. I pick her up with blood everywhere. Her bottom teeth are no longer there. I grab wipes and try to stop the bleeding all the while screaming for someone ANYONE to get in to help. Finally I ran out to the living room, called Kev down to watch the boys, and head to the dentist. They say if we can bring the teeth in they may be able to put them back in. Finally after searching we find them. We go in. After 3 tries they are in. I am crying, she is crying, and I just want to die. Why didn't I get her clothes first? So many what ifs. We go home and I don't want to put her down. She won't remember this moment years from now, but I always will.

10. Two days later, my parents come in for a visit. We went to Greenbluff and George and I actually got a date! We went and saw Bourne Ultimatum. It was pretty cool!

This week has been pretty relaxed. I started back at work. But, unfortunately for my boss and my schedule, we can't get Ahnika into daycare until Aug 30th because of the Hep A. So, I frantically figured out a schedule. We took Sophia back to the dentist and she has an infection. If it is not better by Monday, we have to take the teeth out and she will be toothless there until her permanent ones come in. Please pray for healing. She is such a trooper. I took Ahnika in yesterday for a "happy visit". They were so good to her! She had a ball. I wish my dentist visits were that fun.

This weekend my bestest friend ever is coming. I might actually get some time away from home with her. We grew up next door to each other since I was 2. She is like my sister. I am so excited!

The kids has so much fun running through the sprinkler. It was Ahnika's first time. It was like it was the first time everytime it came back down on them! Priceless, for sure.

We were all dancing to the African Children's Choir. Shhh, don't mention that the musical instruments were from Mexico and not Africa. :) I do keep my daughter dressed, it is her that doesn't like to keep it on.
Yes, this is what happens when you don't pay attention for like 5 min. Stickers are found and placed in many areas. I won't show the wall or bench my other daughter colored "Bwue Bwue".

Well, time to get back to work. Have a great weekend!

Day 1 through Day 6

2007-08-04T14:54:00.000-07:00

Day 1 through Day 6 - A journey of love - missing and found

Nafkot - Meaning what was missing is now found - Our sweet girl is home!

Day 1 -

Well, we made it to Rome. We are refuelling and hope to airbound within 45 min. The flights haven’t been to bad so far. I had to run through Chicago to catch my flight and mom was delayed in Denver, but we are here.

We got word there was a glitch in the paperwork for our embassy appointment so I pray everything goes well and we can still leave on the 28th. Otherwise I will be in Addis a little longer!

This is all pretty exciting. I have been on a rollercoaster today of emotions. Last night I went to bed around midnight and woke up at 2 am to get ready for the airport. I slept a little on the first flights. I did sleep on the way to Rome for about 5 hours. The joys of Ambien. We are still scheduled to land at 7. Then the fun begins. I am hoping Carolyn makes it to the airport, but I understand if she doesn’t. It is so hard the first few days with your children, being tired, culture shock, etc.

I feel so blessed to share this journey with my mom. We have gotten along great and I look forward to see Ethiopia through her eyes for the first time.

Day 2 -

We landed in Addis Ababa around 7:15 pm 7/19. The flight really wasn't bad. The last three hours was long, but we slept, talked and met some cool people. The meals on there were great. I felt like I was always eating. I am so hungry right now, but m&ms and popcorn will have to do.

Going thru the airport was easy the second time around. Visas went well, bags all came. The only problem was AAI sent a driver and I thought it was the driver the Guest House sent. I was wondering why he wouldn't let me pay!

It was so awesome to Kidist, Alayhu and Hannah. It was definitely like coming home. They are such awesome people. Kidist showed mom the pictures we sent. I can't wait to give her more!

Tomorrow morning we go to the Embassy to try to file for the IR3 visa rather than the IR4. This would make her an automatic citizen when we land in the US. Our paperwork was filed finally today. Hopefully this means her Visa will be done by early next week! So, after the Embassy we get to meet her. I am so excited.

I got to meet Carolyn, Kiel and her sweeties. Poor girl, the baby has scabies and the boys have lice. I actually saw a live lice for the first time. I am praying Nafkot doesn't have any.

Well, I better get to bed. Tomorrow is the big day.

I miss my family so much. I wish they were here to experience all of this. It is so crazy to be back here a YEAR later!

Day 3

Woke up at 6:30 am to call the family and the phones are down. I am bummed. We had a wonderful breakfeast. There are 3 people here teaching kids and adults in different schools. There are 3 older gentlemen working on well drilling. Then their is the Tweitmeyers who adopted also.

It is so good to see Kidist and Hannah and show them pictures. Kidist and Aleyu are heading to America on Sunday so Kidist can have surgery. I pray I am able to see them while they are in the States.

we are just sititing here waiting for Nate to get us to go to the Embassy. Then we get to go get Nafkot. I feel bad for habtamu, carolyn’s son. He is crying right now. I remember those moments so well with my boys! Boy do I miss my kids. I can’t wait to get back home to them!

Nate mom and I went to the embassy. I have to get proof from George that he was here last year for the IR3 visa. Gail didn’t get the stuff to him before she left. bummer. The CDC has the waiver and so hopefully by Monday Naroibi will have the waiver and by Tues/Wed it will be done.

We learned so much from Nate about here and process. He is a great addition to AAI. He was able to get us a cell phone to rent and then we can charge the number with Birr and people can call us. It is free incoming calls so our families back home can call and get a hold of us even if we aren’t at the Guest House.

After the embassy we drove back, picked up the cameras and picked up Carolyn to go to AHOPE. It was surreal really. When i got there I was just another stranger. She finally came to me and it was love from then on. She is really a doll. She barely cries unless she is tired or hurt. Poor girl, she has molluscum all over her face, arms and legs. I know they hurt her when we try to get rid of them. She is a brave little one. There was a going away party for the volunteers when we were there and the kids sang sons and had cookies. Then Nafkot got to give each child a sucker we brought. She was pretty proud. We also got to watch them eat lunch. It was amazing how good the kids are! They line up to wash hands, sit in their seats and eat. After they eat, they go wash their hands again, and then get their drink. If only my kids were like that now!

Our biggest worry right now with her is lice. She does have it. We are hoping to get all the eggs out before we leave. I don’t want to bring them home! She also will have to have surgery on an embilical hernia (did I spell that right?). I have heard it is not that bad. I met with the nurses for her meds and time frames. I totally forgot to see where she sleeps, if there are any toys left that I sent, etc. Next time.

We then walked back home and had dinner. I treated her for lice, gave her a bath, and got her ready for the day. later that afternoon we went to the market for snack foods. Last night was awesome to get to know her. After bed Carolyn, Kiel, Mom, and I stayed up and visited. Sleeping wasn’t the best, I must say. I finally fell asleep at about 3 am and then was awoke at 7 am. Nafkot sleeps all over the place.

Day 4

I woke up to a phone call from Dad to mom. I impatiently waited for one from George, but I gave him the wrong number. Finally I got to talk to him. I miss him so bad. I cry wishing he were here. It was good to talk to all the kids. It is Nick’s birthday and I am sad I wasn’t there. After eating we got ready to go. We didn’t have definite plans today. We went to a new HIV orphanage that was being set-up and Carolyn and fam brought donations to them. Then we went to lunch at a great restaraunt. I am not feeling so well so it was a struggle all day. I started taking cipro this morning. It really puts a damper on the day. After lunch at Le Jardin we looked for a medical care center but Barlow was closed. From there we went to the Hilton, got our Airline tickets confirmed, exchanged some money and then got online. This year was so different from last year. I was able to check all my emails and send some. Last year I sent one and checked one. After that we headed out after Carolyn’s son bolted from Kiel. After the Hilton we went to some markets looking for suitcase for Aleyu and Kidist, scarves, dresses, fabric, misc. We hit many stores and by the last one we were all at meltdown mode. We came home and rested before dinner. It was an emotional night for me tonight. Kidist and Aleyu leave tomorrow night for America. She is really sick and has tried everything here with no fixes. A police man from VA has helped them find a doctor and will stay with them and got them plane tickets for America. It is such a blesisng from God that they get to do this. I am in awe of His glory. Tonight we gave them their suitcase and carry-on bag. They were so humbled by these gifts. It is so awesome they have this opportunity. After that it was time to get ready bed. So, here I sit typing. I think it is time to get to bed.

Tomorrow we will go to an international church, visit AHOPE, have a coffee ceremony, and Yodit’s brother is going to come pick up their gifts. Hopefully it will be relaxing.

Day 5

Today we went to the International church. It was in English and about 1 John. HOnestly, I was so exhausted, I don't know all that he talked about. I think there was a discussion on lightness and darkness and picking to always live in the light. We went with the Tweitmeyers, Joe, Josh, and Katie. It was cool. We had Macchiottos before church, which is the best drink EVER! After church, we went to the Paradise Cafe on top of Kaldi's coffee. It was great food and the view was awesome! After that we went home for a coffee ceremony from Kidist, a visit from the brother of an Ethiopian woman who lives here in SPokane, visit Nafkot's orphanage again, and head back for dinner. We brought some donations from friends to the orphanage and got to hang out with the kids again. It was awesome. That night we were able to pray for Kidist and Alayu before leaving for America. What a humbling experience to know I was able to be there when they left. They are my family and I can't wait to see them again - preferrably, this side of heaven. I woke up as they left early in the morning. Thank you Lord for them in my life!

Day 6

Today was crazy. We went to the dr for 5 hours. It was really long and Nafkot did fairly well. Finally we got back at 2 pm had a quick lunch and then went back to AHOPE at 3 to get ready for goodbye ceremony. We got there and Nafkot would not let me put her down. It was very hard after awhile. The ceremony was awesome. They prayed for the children, sang to them, and they got a traditional outfit to take home. Then we went to dinner with Sidisse (the doctor for the orphanage) and the paradise grill. I will write more about this when I am not so tired. Sidisse told me nafkot’s grandmother visited her many times at AHOPE and her brother visited 2 times. I will meet her on Friday at 9:30 am. We still don’t know about our waiver.

Tomorrow we go to Sodo for 2 days. I am praying it goes well.

I will write more about the rest of my journey later.

We are home now and doing well. I have learned when to stop tantrums and what her needs are. She is a happy girl, most of the time. I think the kids here are having the harder time adjusting. Thank you all for your prayers as I travelled and for all the calls and emails to George while I was gone. He is such a great dad. He painted the girls room, rearranged and hung new shelves. It was the best welcome home gift ever! Today we went to Greenbluff to pick some peaches. We will go back in a few weeks for more and for berries, but it was so good to get out! The girls have totally bonded. Nafkot really takes care of Sophia - feeds her, comforts her when she cries, holds her hand, etc. I think they will be great for each other. The biggest problem is when I am holding one, I have to hold the other! But they are cute!

And two shall become one ...

2007-07-17T12:02:00.000-07:00

This is a message to my husband. I sit and frantically pack and get ready to pick up our new daughter - the daughter that God drew to your heart before mine was ever opened. How did we get here? Only by God's grace and mercy did we make it through these years to where we are. I am so sad to leave you, even for this short time. This is the longest we have been away (crazy I know), and I am sad it is now. You are my rock, my life, my everything. Knowing you will be there when I return is the strength that will keep me going.

I am such a blessed woman to know you and to have you as my husband, my leader, my friend. How did I become so blessed. You are an awesome father, son and husband. God sees your good works and you will be glorified in heaven. You are a light to me when I am down. I will pray for you as I am gone.

What other husbands allow their wives as much freedom as you have done. Thank you, thank you. I have been given such an opportunity to bond with our daughter and to bring her home while you care for the others. They love you so much. You are such a role model and just knowing you they will also know how much their big Father in heaven loves them.

I love you, my dear, now and forever. Thank you Lord for sending me this husband. God, watch over him and bless his time with our children here. Thank you Jesus for his life in mine. Thank you for our bond and love we have. Lord protect us as we are away. Keep our eyes on you and the prize you have died for. Lord, bless our journey and our homecoming. Lord you are an awesome God WE serve. Thank you for everything.

My sweet prince, I love you. Watch over our children and love on them as you always do. I will miss you.

Your sweet princess.

Beautiful Chaos

2007-07-15T21:57:00.000-07:00

For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, 39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:38-39 (KJV)

Through our love for God we are blessed with so much. During prayer time last weekend with some close friends, my hubby mentioned how our weekend was a beautiful chaos. We had 4 families staying at our cabin outside of Yellowstone Park. There were about 18 people to one bathroom and 2 1/2 beds. :) It was AWESOME. These other families also adopted from Ethiopia and for the first time I got to meet them. God is so awesome to provide us this blessing of meeting. Here are some pictures of the weekend. It was a great time, and I can't wait to try again next year!

This was the highlight for me. I grew up here and yet I still am in wonder of the glory of bears.

Hanging out at the paint pots. It was hot, but the kids all did great.

Yes, this is my son. But oh, the little girls LOVED him!

Here is another shot of the bear. No zoom here, just up close and personal!

After lunch we all waded in the river, but it turned into an afternoon swim!

Oh, Nick, you are SOOOO funny!

These three guys were inseperable. I think Ms. H and A should move west. :)

What post isn't perfect without daddy and his little girl.

And what weekend of families with Ethiopian children is not complete without roasted coffee!

These two are made for each other. Thankfully, my wonderful friend KT has to pay the dowry to marry my son. Awww, it was love at first laugh. I think Caleb has found his life time partner. She is so him!

Oh, Daddy, you are the coolest!

Didn't I say these guys were inseparable?

Alden just came home from China and it was such a blessing to meet him. These women were wonderful and I am so happy I have them. I only have a few more families to go until I meet the whole crew!

In case I don't post before I leave, check back. I will try while in country to post, but we will see what email is like.

Love,
Sandra

One year ago today...

2007-07-11T23:11:00.001-07:00

So, one year ago today God made His promises just. I received the wonderful blessing of 3 new little ones! I will try to post pictures soon, but honestly folks, I am exhausted. We just got back from 5 days in Montana visiting with friends and I am frantically packing to leave next WEDNESDAY!!!! So, as I reflect on my journey last year, I have a whole new one this year! The day I leave for our new sweet Ethiopian princess is the day we landed on US soil with our first three little ones. God has been awesome through all of this. I am truly amazed at his provision of strength, joy, love, grace, mercy and finances. I am amazed at how blessed I am today. Tonight we went to dinner for Nick's birthday. It is next week, but I will be gone. What a special treat to have yet another reason to celebrate.

There has been so much going on, but I need to get to bed. I will try to write tomorrow or this weekend.

Love,
me

Seriously - Are we there yet?

2007-07-02T21:29:00.000-07:00

I am so ready to travel - and get it over with! This anxiety stuff is old! I have worked so much to get caught up that if I never sit in front of this computer I would be ok. Well, except to check emails for updates.

I leave in 16 days and 7 hours. Crazy. I mean really crazy. I leave Thursday afternoon for Yellowstone. While there I get to hang out with many of my friends! Praise GOD!!!! There are going to be 3 maybe 4 families that have all adopted kids from Ethiopia. Words cannot describe my excitement about finally meeting these women I have been in fellowship with for almost a year! God is so good.

For those of you who have done this there is so much emotions that go into it. Excitement, fear, anxiety, love, fear, finances (still need $3500, but who is counting?), leaving my family behind, unknown health of Nafkot, etc. etc. It is so exciting, but am I seriously ready to care for another? Can I handle 4 kids this young?

With God's provision and STRENGTH - YES!!!!

Please pray for us over the next 2 weeks. You guys are awesome!

Father's Day is Family Day!

2007-06-21T12:06:00.000-07:00

So the Word became human and made his home among us. He was full of unfailing love and faithfulness. And we have seen his glory, the glory of the Father’s one and only Son. John 1:14

Father's Day had special meaning for me this year. It was a great reminder that I have 2 fathers - my earthly father and my Holy Father. My earthly father is awesome. He is the best Grandpa ever! My Heavenly Father loves me unconditionally. He sent His son to this earth to save me and all of us. Give Him praise for what He did!

So, we went to Silverwood on the Saturday of Father's Day weekend. The only child that wasn't there was Malcom. It was a whole whopping 60 degrees, but we made the best of it. It has rollercoasters and a water park. Swimming with an outside temp of 60 degrees and WIND was not the best, but we made it fun. Caleb and Giovanni tried the big roller coasters. Giovanni thought it was funny, but Caleb didn't. He screamed the whole time! It was the perfect Father's Day. Especially since we only spend $100 for the whole day - food and park fees included. There were buy one get one free and my hubby won four tickets.

Here are some pictures from the glorious day.

Garfield and the kids

The very end of the day - tired and happy.

Amazingly enough, Sophia lasted about 20 min. Poor thing just shook she was so cold.

Before hitting the park. Gotta love crazy kids.

Whitney (Nick's girlfriend) and I LOVED this ride. We laughed the whole time.

Daddy, Caleb, Kevin and Mikaya (Kev's GF) on the log ride.

They had the coolest kid water park. It was awesome!

Kevin and George went down the big slide. NO WAY!

100 post and all you ever wanted to know about me

2007-06-04T21:56:00.000-07:00

So, here are 100 useless facts about me:

1. God is the center of my life.
2. My husband is second.
3. My kids are 3rd.
4. I am an engineer.
5. I work for a private engineering firm.
6. I work 4 hours in the office in the morning, and 4 hours at home.
7. I have 7 children - Kevin (20 yrs), Malcom (20 yrs), Nick (17 yrs), Giovanni (7 yrs), Caleb (almost 6 yrs), Nafkot (2 1/2 yrs), Sophia (16 months)
8. We have 3 adopted children at home and one waiting in Ethiopia.
9. We took all our children to Ethiopia last year. The airline tickets cost as much as the adoption.
10. We met Nafkot while in Ethiopia.
11. I enjoy talking with my friends who have adopted online.
12. My husband wishes I didn't spend so much time online.
13. Giovanni believes that he can train to Superman - I never told him he can't fly.
14. I attend Real Life Ministries.
15. I work with Middle School youth at church for 7 yrs.
16. I grew up in Bozeman, MT.
17. I moved here 8 yrs ago.
18. I love to read the bible and any books when I have the time.
19. My favorite shows are 24, Amazing Race, Prison Break, Hell's Kitchen, ER, Survivor, Biggest Loser, Beauty and the Geek, and probably any other reality TV show.
20. My brother was an intern for SNL and I got to attend their 15 yr anniversary party.
21. I have been to Ethiopia, Italy, Germany, Switzerland, Canada, Mexico and Israel.
22. My grandpa is buried at Arlington.
23. My grandma lives with my parents in Bozeman.
24. I have 2 dogs and 5 cats.
25. I have already got Sophia trained that purses are awesome and you ALWAYS need more than one.
26. I overpack on trips - ask the hubby about our honeymoon.
27. My dream is to retire in Italy and Ethiopia.
28. My mama is going to Ethiopia with me this year.
29. My son, Malcom, is in Germany for the Air Force. (we love you and miss you malchi!)
30. I love God!
31. Jesus is my best friend.
32. My second best friend/sister (only behind Jesus) is Lora. I grew up next door to her since I was 2. We have experienced a lot together.
33. I was a rebellious teenager and have apologized over and over to my parents.
34. I was married and divorced to a not-so-nice man.
35. I am married to the most wonderful man in the world. Did I mention he is so hot! Girls, you can't have him.
36. I hit my son's car tonight. I didn't look on the side mirror. Ripped the bumper right off! Good job, mom.
37. I go to bed at 11:30 and wake up at 5:30.
38. I live in an old rundown farm house. I love it.
39. I drove a Chevy Citation in high school. When I got in my first wreck, we called it the scrambled egg.
40. I love crab and could eat it everyday.
41. I joined weight watchers and have lost 30 pounds.
42. I grew up with a black lab and calico cat.
43. I am afraid of Miller Moths and other creepy crawly things.
44. My favorite actress is Doris Day.
45. My favorite movie is Pillow Talk.
46. I have two cell phones. One for work, one for home.
47. I am a stress case. I like to yell a lot.
48. I have a bike I bought last year and I only rode it around the yard.
49. I used to sell Mary Kay and Stampin' Up.
50. I am bored already typing this.
51. I read a devotional (short one) every evening and morning before bed.
52. My ideal date with my hubby is to actually get 2 hours without any kids - anywhere.
53. I am norwegian/irish/german.
54. My father is a retired Army Lt. Colonel, policeman, and probation and parole officer.
55. My mom is a retired Army Lt. Colonel and nurse. She is a counselor right now.
56. My brother works for a newspaper.
57. I have one sibling, but 6 in-law siblings.
58. I enjoy doing dishes and vacuuming.
59. i don't like mowing the yard.
60. I start projects, but don't finish them.
61. My favorite place is Beaver Creek in Montana.
62. My name means God's Little Helper.
63. I like horses, but don't have any.
64. I like winters in Montana right after a snowfall.
65. My favorite time is to sit at our cabin during sunrise with coffee in my hand.
66. I look forward to the day Christ returns. I just pray it is when you all are saved!
67. My cats are called after lakes in MOntana.
68. I have an Ethiopian/Italian/Irish/American. Giovanni has the Italian name, Ethiopian blood, Irish birthday and is soon-to-be an American.
69. I am a huge procrastinator.
70. I don't take risks - except on roller coasters.
71. I used to go to Disneyland every other year.
72. I have one grandparent left.
73. My parents are still married.
74. I don't throw anything away.
75. I wish this 100 things would get over.
76. I own about 100 purses and 25 lotions/body sprays.
77. I rarely wear make-up.
78. I liked the smurfs groing up.
79. I still like My Little Pony and Strawberry Shortcake.
80. I listen to Christian music.
81. My favorite clothes are jeans, a cotton shirt and a long sleeve over shirt.
82. I used to own cowboy boots.
83. I have never been artsy. My poor kids suffer.
84. I kill every plant I try to grow.
85. I like to barter for things.
86. I have had 2 surgeries on each foot and a torn Achilles.
87. I like to follow peoples blogs.
88. I am hoping to bring Mark Shultz here for a fundraiser.
89. I now tell my boys to "suck it up" if they get hurt. 5 boys will do that to you.
90. I don't think I could homeschool. I have no patience.
91. My husband only likes to wear shorts - even in freezing weather.
92. I love popcorn. I eat a bowl everyday.
93. I am a completely different person after I went to Ethiopia.
94. I can cry at anything.
95. I like girl movies.
96. I think movie theaters are a rip off. Discount cinemas are the best.
97. I got my license at 15.
98. My favorite part of the day is to climb into bed exhausted.
99. I thank God everyday I have him. Without him, my crazy life would have not meaning!
100. I am totally 100% in love with my God, my hubby, my kids and my family. My husband is my rock and I still get butterflies thinking about him.

There you have it. That took forever! If you actually read this far, wow. You are awesome.

Beauty - what does it mean?

2007-06-04T12:50:00.000-07:00

I saw this on a blog I read. HOW TRUE!!!!

My next entry is my 103rd. I am a little off on my 100th and posting 100 things about me, but I will catch up. I was also tagged by some friend's blogs to post 7 things about me, so I will do it all in one. I hope to get it done this week!

And presenting ....

2007-05-25T14:03:00.001-07:00

...... Nafkot. The newest memeber of our family. Added on May 24, 2007. I love our Lord!

I hope to travel with my mommy and a close friend mid-July.

Thank you all for your prayers!

3rd time is a charm, right?

2007-05-23T16:29:00.000-07:00

So, in just about 8 hours we will have our 3rd court date. I thought it would be smooth sailing until tonight, yet tomorrow morning we got a call from our caseworker. It went something like this:

Is Sandra there?
This is she.
This is >>>> from AAI. I have some news for you.
OK. (at this point I thought either Nafkot died, was withdrawn from adoption, or we passed court)
The grandmother has decided to put Nafkot's brother up for adoption.
OK
We want to know if you would be interseted.

So the conversation continued as my heart beat faster and faster. After many phone calls, emails, prayer, and talks, it was decided we would not adopt him. It turns out that the Grandmother doesn't want them to be split up and since we are not going to adopt him, she will keep him and we will just sponsor him.

So, a crazy 36 hours I must say. I really hope court passes tonight. I am tired of waiting and so ready to go get her! I tentatively have tickets booked for July 18th.

So, please pray for us that this time it happens. I want a full nights sleep for once! :)

Blessings,
Sandra

Our friends the Qualls

2007-05-19T20:11:00.000-07:00

Qualls family of 10

The Qualls girls

Mommy and Daddy and Kalkidan

A grand reunion for mommy!
Love.....simple.
Precious. E holding K's hand.
A bond.

1st sight of their girl!

1 more week ...

2007-05-17T12:59:00.000-07:00

"The sacrifice you want is a broken spirit. A broken and repentant heart, O God, you will not despise." Psalm 51:17

"But I am like an olive tree, thriving in the house of God. I trust in God's unfailing love, forever and ever. I will praise you forever, O God, for what you have done. I will wait for your mercies in the presence of your people." Psalm 52:8-9

We heard from our casework today. We have another NEW court date of May 24th. This time, the judge is requiring us to sponsor Nafkot's brother before he/she approves the adoption. The head of our agency is going to Ethiopia the end of May and hopes to resolve this issue before it affects other families. I am sad because I have to wait yet another week to find out if she is our daughter. Yet, I know in my heart she is. This adoption stuff is so hard on a person. I stayed up till 1 am last night and then woke around 5:30 am. It has been a midnight or later week! I would love to run away with my hubby for one night to sleep and reconnect, but life drags you back. But, soon all my children will be grown and gone and I will be sleeping TOO much! :)

So, prayer warriors, get your prayers ready again next week. Thank you all for your encouragement and prayers. We need protection so desperately right now. I will be fasting this week and I challenge you all to. I have not decided yet what that will be, but I will let you know. (My hubby would love the computer!)

Here are some random pictures to cheer you up!

Did I ever mention we were TP'd? Nick's tennis team got us one night while we were all awake, inside and we have dogs! They also got all four cars. It was hilarious! Teenagers....

Grandpa and Little One 2 (I am Little One - the original)

She cracks me up! She loves to lick glass - especially at the hockey rink where it is cold (I know you think, gross, but seriously, have you been to Ethiopia to see what it is like in the bathrooms?)

She is too funny!

My mom actually went into the big tube thing and went down the circular vinyl enclosed slide. Did I tell you my mom ROCKS! She also went off the high dive diving board when I was a kid. She is afraid of heights!

As she sleeps

2007-05-16T14:42:00.000-07:00

As she sleeps, I sit here dreaming of the day she comes home. As she sleeps, the world spins around her. As she sleeps she is unaware of the impact she has on this world. As she sleeps, I pray.

While Malcom is soon to load a plane bound for Germany (check my last post), I sit here working, the kids are cleaning up toys, my friends join in prayer, my soon-to-be daughter sleeps, God prepares us for this journey we are about to embark on. So many people ask if we can love biological and adoptive kids the same. Absolutely! I love this girl even though I have only met her once. She is ours.

So, please pray for our daughter, Nafkot. Pray for a positive outcome on the court proceedings to be held on May 17th (or May 16th stateside).

As I sleep, I may become a mom to 7.

A piece of my heart....

2007-05-15T21:14:00.000-07:00

A piece of my heart left yesterday. My first adopted son is now about 8 hours away from Germany. He starts the beginning of his Air Force career. I never knew it would be that hard to say goodbye. To not hear his footsteps crash down the stairs, or him wrestling with the boys, or our talks. I miss him. He took a piece of my heart. I am so proud of him and who he has become. I remember years ago when asked by Kevin if he could move in, NO WAY! I could barely handle the other two boys. Malcom was my first adopted child. He is definitely a blessing from God and he prepared our hearts for the ministry of our adoption.

How does one describe Malcom? Here is my list:

Unselfish, smart, funny, good-looking, brave, gentle, patient, caring, loving, nurturing, intense, peaceful, sensitive, strong, my son, calm, reliable, kind, wonderful, a one-of-a-kind, trustworth, honest, integrity, and so many more.

We love him so much, and although we are so proud and happy for him, we are sad to see him go.

Take care Malcom until you return!

Kevin and Malcom at the airport.

Malcom and his friend Natasha.

Malcom in the airport parking lot.

Malcom and his good friend Kevin, posing!

Malcom and his two little brothers. They are so sad he is gone!

Malcom and Nick - goofballs

Malcom leaving through security.

We had lunch at an awesome Greek restaurant (garlic galore - 36 hours later I can still taste the garlic) yesterday before Malcom left. Here is the "group". We were missing our Kevin. :(

World AIDS Orphan Day

2007-05-07T13:55:00.000-07:00

How can one describe the devastation one disease can do to a world. I have seen it, I have feared it. Today is World AIDS orphan day. Please remember those children who have lost their parents to this devastating disease. When you scroll through old posts, realize my boys are victims of AIDS. Know that our soon-to-be new doctor is a victim. Visit this website: http://www.worldorphansday.org/en/ to learn more about the effects it has. There is always something you can do to help these children. Support hospitals, orphanages, health organizations. Get involved!

There are so many misconceptions about HIV and AIDS. Visit this site to learn more about the disease http://brehane.blogspot.com/. She works with HIV everyday and is a great source of information.

Jeus loves all of us. The sick, the healthy, the adults, the children. HIV and AIDS is not something to look down upon, but to look to see what we can do. Jesus loves the weak and the faithful. "As he entered a village there, ten lepers stood at a distance, crying out, "Jesus, Master, have mercy on us!" He looked at them and said, "Go show yourselves to the priests."* And as they went, they were cleansed of their leprosy. One of them, when he saw that he was healed, came back to Jesus, shouting, "Praise God!" He fell to the ground at Jesus' feet, thanking him for what he had done. This man was a Samaritan. Jesus asked, "Didn't I heal ten men? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give glory to God except this foreigner?" And Jesus said to the man, "Stand up and go. Your faith has healed you." Luke 17:14-19

Who are we to judge people for who they are? Jesus spent time with tax collectors, lepers, woman, prostitutes, why shouldn't we.

How can I ever explain what I saw in the HIV orphanages, in the streets, in the country side. Read Melissa Fay Greene's book "There is no me without you". It is a great reference for what we try to ignore.

Please pray for these orphans and their parents today. Remember they are suffering and need our love and support.

A day in the life of me

2007-05-05T12:28:00.000-07:00

So, here it is finally. The life of a working mom raising 2 young adult stepsons, a friend, a heart adopted airman, and three Ethiopian gems. This is a compilation of a few days. But, overall a typical day. :)

I normally wake up around 6 or 6:30 am. Most mornings Caleb is awake then, too. This morning he got a dollar from the tooth fairy.

I am supposed to be to work by 7 am. Thankfully this clock is 7 min fast and I am only about 7 min from work.

Aw, there's the morning beast. I go to work early (I am supposed to be there at 6 am, but that never happens). George gets the kids off to school and SOphia to daycare.

Here's our neighborhood. The trees are finally fully leaved (no that is probably not a word) and beautiful! So, all you stalkers out there, you can probably figure where we live, oh well. :)

Here is my desk at my office. I work for a local civil engineering firm. I am a professional engineer and I design residential and commercial developments. (Can you see the moose animal on the shelf? For those of you in for Yellowstone 07, you can own one yourself!)

MMMMM, coffee.

Oh, did I tell you my hubby works with me! We have an awesome boss. He is so flexible with our work schedules! George works typically from 9 am to 7 pm.

At 11:20 am every day I leave to go pick up the boys from Kindergarten. My boss allows me to work from home in the afternoons.

Here's their school.

Here's their class. Time to go home!

Home!

While the boys unload their backpacks and get hands washed, I take our dogs out, Brutus the Great Dane and Reeses our spaz lab/shephard.

Today, I started some laundry. About 2 loads a day keeps the whole family up. Now I am down to 1 because I refuse to do the older boys laundry. I mean, come on, you are 17 and 20 and 19!

Mmmm, what a great lunch for them. Corn dogs, apple and egg. They get corn dogs, chicken strips, PB&J, left overs, etc. Whatever is easiest.

I get a salad with apple slices. :(

Then I check blogs I like to follow.

Check emails from my awesome friends.

Then, finally start back at work.

Around 5 pm, I go pick up Sophia from Daycare. Then I come home, make dinner and clean up while the kids play. Evenings are hit and miss. Mondays George goes to Youth Group, Tues is soccer, Wednesday George normally works late, Thursday is shopping or something and Friday is hanging out. This particular night we were shopping.

Here's Justin. He is Nick's friend who lives with us. He works at the car wash with Nick and all their friends. It is nice because we always get to use the services. Nick doesn't have his license so we get his free washes.

Grocery shopping with the fam.

Nightly fit time.

Reading with the boys and time to relax.

Fianlly kids in bed, and catching up on tv, laundry, dishes, whatever.

Notice there are no older boys. They are an endangered species and only come out occasionally or in packs.

Well, there you have it. Life is crazy here and I don't know how we will be able to manage a new one, but with God, everything is possible!

Later I hope to post Giovanni's birthday pictures and other random fun ones.

Blessings!

Another Day

2007-05-02T13:02:00.000-07:00

So, I heard this morning and our court date wasn't successful. Our new court date is May 17th. I am pretty bummed, but I know that God is in control and He knows when is the perfect time for our court date and when to travel.

So, please pray that AAI, our agency, will get the correct letter from her grandmother to show her 4 yr old brother is not up for adoption. That was the delay.

Also, pray for my friend who has her court date May 3rd (tonight in the US).

Thank you all for your prayers, emails, and love. It means a lot to all of us.

Court Date

2007-05-01T20:54:00.000-07:00

So, right now it is 7 am in Ethiopia. My soon-to-be little girl is probably just waking up. Today we have our court date to see if the judge thinks we are fit to take care of her. I am a nervous wreck! The last court date didn't seem so bad, but this one is. Hopefully by this time tomorrow I will know the outcome. I will keep you all posted in the progress. It looks like I will be travelling around the end of August as long as today (tonight) goes well.

Thank you all for your prayers. We covet them while we wait.

Love,
The Raskells

Funny things kids say

2007-04-27T15:19:00.000-07:00

So, my kids really crack me up. It is the little things in life that are funny. Here are some of our funnier moments with a 7 yr old and 5 yr old:

The boys are taking their Friday afternoon baths. I can hear splashing and laughing. I listen. "Giovanni, did you smell dat? I farted. He-he-he" "OK, Caleb, let me try." More splashing and laughter. "I smelded that. Awww, that smells good. heheheh" Oh my children.

A few days ago Giovanni's eye hurt. I told him to quit rubbing his eye. Here is our conversation.

"Mom, my eye hurt."
"OK, it always hurts." (no, I am not a bad mom, he just rubs them with dirty hands)
"What if flower growing in eye."
"A flower can't grow in your eye."
"Yes it can. Seed get in eye (they got flower seeds from school) and my tears warter it (yes, water sounds like warter)."
"No, you need soil to grow."
"No, flower grow in my eye with eyes water."Caleb "I cry lot. I grow flower too!"

The best ever was today after lunch. Giovanni came up to me with a rock he found at school.

"Mom?"

"Yes?"

Will this make me Superman?"

"No, honey, it is not Kryptonite."

"Where is Kryptonite? Can I get? What it look like?"

"It is green. If you can find some, then you may be like Superman."

"Will people talk to me then?"

"What people?"

"Like on Superman movie. People talk to him."

"Sure."

He also will be attending a college where he can learn how to be Superman. They also killed a spider so it didn't bite Sophia. "If spider bite us, will we be like Spiderman?"

Did I tell you my children firmly believe everything they hear and say? I really did try to explain not everything on TV is real and they were just crushed.

Is there anyone else out there whose child calls everything he? Giovanni's scab fell off his knee and "I blood today, mom. He gonna fall off and I bleed." Everything is he. I mean everything. Spoons, dinner, poop, dirt, bike, paper, shirt, etc. Everything! It is cute.

Well, there is a little insight to my children. Soon I will be posting my "day in the life". If I ever get a life and have time! :)

Did I share with you how much I love all my children? I always talk about the little ones and never much about the older ones. Nick is such an amazing child. He has been dating this awesome girl who has gotten him back to church! They go to prom this weekend, so I will post pictures. He has such a sensitive heart and he is so dear in my heart. The best thing, he loves his dad so much. He still calls him Daddy.

Kevin is definitely unique. How do I describe him. He is the kid that no matter how much you want to be mad at him, he has this smile that makes you not. That is why I am always mad at him when he isn't around! He has a girlfriend who is such a joy to be around. She has grown so much in the last year. We just keep praying she will be able to go to church with us. Kevin adores his little sister and is a terror to his brothers.

Malcom comes home May 4th! Yeah! Our lives are so much better with him in it. There is a void here that will never be filled. I know I will cherish every minute with him when he returns. We are so proud of him and all he has done. Keep in his prayers as he moves on in his journey of the Air Force.

I look at my life when I was a teenager, and I can't describe how much different these guys are. They don't drink, they don't do drugs, they just have a good time with friends. We are always welcome to hang out with them, but honestly why. Boys - to embarrasing for me! They typically just go bowling, dennys, the movies or the mall or our house. I couldn't ask for more.

So, that sums up the love I hold for each child. Of course then there is Nafkot and hopefully in 5 days she will be ours and we can post her picture!

Here are my big boys last Easter!

Blessings!

The New Passover

2007-04-04T20:57:00.000-07:00

Moses had announced to Pharaoh, "This is what the LORD says: At midnight tonight I will pass through the heart of Egypt. All the firstborn sons will die in every family in Egypt, from the oldest son of Pharaoh, who sits on his throne, to the oldest son of his lowliest servant girl who grinds the flour. Even the firstborn of all the livestock will die. Then a loud wail will rise throughout the land of Egypt, a wail like no one has heard before or will ever hear again. But among the Israelites it will be so peaceful that not even a dog will bark. Then you will know that the LORD makes a distinction between the Egyptians and the Israelites. Exodus 11:4-7

What does Easter mean? Really? What does it mean to you? What do you celebrate? We hunt for eggs, we go to church, we have ham, and we thank Jesus for dying and then coming to life. But is that truly what it means?

I bought Prince of Egypt for the kids. I want them to understand why we are saved and how we are saved. Read Exodus. It goes into detail why the Israelites were to find a pure and spotless lamb. Durning their slavery in Egypt, the Israelites were to find a pure spotless lamb. They were to raise it and care for it until the right time. At that time they were to sacrifice it and place the blood on the door posts of their house. Why a lamb? Why the blood? What does it mean?

When Adam and Eve took the apple and ate, death came over them. They were separated from God, as we are now. The only way to get back into connection with God is through a sacrifice. This lamb was the Israelites sacrifice to the Lord. By spreading the blood on the door posts, the angel of death passed over them. This passover was celerated after that in thanks for the Lord.

So, what is the New Passover? First we need to recognize we NEED a sacrifice for our sins. We all sin. Whether big or small, we need that sacrifice. So, as time passed, God knew we needed the sacrifice of the Lamb of God. This was Jesus. Our ultimate sacrifice so that once and for all we were forgiven.

The next day John saw Jesus coming toward him and said, "Look! The Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world!" John 1:29.

But he was pierced for our rebellion, crushed for our sins.He was beaten so we could be whole. He was whipped so we could be healed.6 All of us, like sheep, have strayed away. We have left God's paths to follow our own.Yet the LORD laid on him the sins of us all.7 He was oppressed and treated harshly, yet he never said a word.He was led like a lamb to the slaughter. And as a sheep is silent before the shearers, he did not open his mouth.8 Unjustly condemned, he was led away.*No one cared that he died without descendants, that his life was cut short in midstream.*But he was struck down for the rebellion of my people.9 He had done no wrong and had never deceived anyone.But he was buried like a criminal; he was put in a rich man's grave.10 But it was the LORD's good plan to crush him and cause him grief.Yet when his life is made an offering for sin, he will have many descendants.He will enjoy a long life, and the LORD's good plan will prosper in his hands.11 When he sees all that is accomplished by his anguish, he will be satisfied.And because of his experience, my righteous servant will make it possiblefor many to be counted righteous, for he will bear all their sins.12 I will give him the honors of a victorious soldier, because he exposed himself to death.He was counted among the rebels. He bore the sins of many and interceded for rebels. Isaiah 53:5-12

Jesus is our Lamb. He is our sacrifice. Lay your hands on Him. Feel the pure lamb under your hands. His blood covers the door posts of our hearts. Praise Him for His broken body. Thank you for the blood to cover my sins. They are so many. Acknowledge Him and for the Resurrection. Die to self and come alive anew in Christ - daily. We were all nailed on the cross with our Savior, but He bore the pain and suffering for us.

Without Him, there is no hope, no meaning. Why live if all we get is death? With Jesus and confessing our sins to Him we are no longer dead - but alive in Christ.

Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God's right hand. Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. Colossians 3:1-2

So, as we approach the day of our Lord's Resurrection, remember why we are here. Set your eyes to Heaven and in everything you do, do it for Christ. He died for us.

Blessings,

Sandra

Ethiopia and we are in Group L

2007-03-28T20:58:00.000-07:00

"For he issued his decree to Jacob; he gave his law to Israel. He commanded our ancestors to teach them to their children, so the next generation might know them-even the children not yet born-that they in turn might teach their children. So each generation can set its hope anew on God, remembering his glorious miracles and obeying his commands." Psalm 78:5-7

This passage rings so true. It is God's promise to Abraham, Issac, Jacob, and Joseph that we will be blessed through them. Each generation is to teach their children so they will know the awesome power and love of our Lord. We are to rest daily in His arms for strength and mercy. I feel so blessed to know He is on my side. He knows what will happen. He knew from the beginning these children I am to raise. He knew how hard it would be to give up our will for His in adoption. He knows these children need homes. It is so hard to remember seeing all their faces - wishing for a home. What about the children left behind with no new mommy and daddy. Do they deserve less? I pray constantly for them. Ethiopia is so special. I can't believe I was priveledged enough to go there. Here are some pictures of our journey. I can't wait to travel again soon! I wrote below our good news. Pray for these parents, the children, and for continued grace for all of us!

We got word today we are in Group L. This means that we are being petitioned before the courts for a court date. So hopefully in 10 days we will have a court date! Then this is where the waiting begins. After court we won't be travelling for at least 4 months. It will be hard because she will be ours but we have to wait so long! I just know our Lord is faithful and will protect her and us as we wait for her homecoming. So please pray we hear soon of our court date and that the next four months will go by quickly!

Dossiers, Hockey, and a cutie

2007-03-15T23:58:00.000-07:00

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart".

What a great weekend this is going to be! We just found out tonight our Dossier will be off to Ethiopia tomorrow. Now it needs to be translated, go to different agencies and then on the list for a court date. George and I went in yesterday with Kevy to get our fingerprints. Always fun with INS. I hope I don't have to go back. Being a mom to 6 has dried out my hands. Pray I don't have to!

We also have my parents and grandma coming in from Montana for Giovanni's 7th birthday. We are frantically getting ready. Well, I am typing and my awesome husband is super cleaning the bathroom. Leave it to him to be my rock once again and keep this family together.

We also have Nick's championship Hockey weekend. Here are some pictures from last years games. The first one is Nick and the second is Kevin. I am going to miss watching them!

Other than that, like is still crazy and chaotic. We got medical about our sweet one and she is still sick, but they are taking care of her. Now we just need to get her home and safe and loved. It is hard because she has a new scar on her face. I feel so bad because I am not there to scoop her up and wipe away the tears. Soon, Lord, soon.

Here is our precious little girl eating her first popcicle. It was way too fun for her!

This is one of her 1 yr old presents - a Strawberry Shortcake outfit. Isn't she just so cute! And yes, she fully walks.

May God bless your weekend.

Changes...

2007-03-13T09:56:00.000-07:00

So, we have been home for almost 8 months. It has been crazy, but such a blessing from God. I want to show you how far we have come.

This is Giovanni's referral picture. We know now he had never sat on a toilet, ate bread, potatoes and corn every day. He hearded goats, picked coffee, carried water and went to the market. He spoke his regional language Wolaittan. He came home with giardia, scalp problems and malnurishment.

This is Giovanni last December. He speaks English really well, can write letters, is learning shapes, colors, language, writing, and small words. He love to draw and color. He has such a gentle and imaginative spirit. He is my little smartie. His birthday is March 17th so that makes him an Ethiopian, Irish, Italian American.

Here is our little spitfire Caleb. He has changed SO much. He was supposed to 3 1/2, but is 5 going on 7. :) When we brought him home he had never seen a toilet, was whipped by his mom, only had eaten potatoes, had never held a pen or silverware, was full of giardia and bacteria, and was severely malnourished. He was a size 3.

Here is he today. He has grown 6 inches, gained 7 pounds, speaks english very well, Is learning shapes, colors, numbers, letters, words, etc. He is a very competitive and strives to be the best. He is very active and has tons of energy. He is going to be trouble.

Here are the boys 2 weeks after home. We went to Bozeman to visit family. I face painted their face with Spongue Bob and the Ethiopian flag. Look how much smaller Caleb was, now he is taller!

I couldn't get Sophia's referral picture to post, but here is a picture of her being held by her big brother, Malcom. Note no hair and she is wearing 3/6 month clothes. She was on formula, baby cereal, she could sit with help but was very active. She was 5 months when we go her and weighed 16 pounds.

Here she is with Great-Grandma Mabel 2 weeks after coming home.

Here is our baby girl at 12 months. She now ways 22 pounds and is in 12 month size clothes. She is a hoot to play with. She says so many words and has such a personality. Watch out, cuz her teenage years are going to hard!

It just amazes me at what a little food, love, and medicines can do. I look back at pictures of our trip and realize how far they have come. I just can't believe what they can do.

Language: They have lost most of their native toungue. They are doing so well with their Enlish. They love school and to learn. They are starting to recognize words.

Health: Other than colds, both boys are extremely healthy. We are still fighting ear infections with Sophia.

Ethiopia: It is such a love in my heart. I cannot wait to go back to wait for our new little one. The boys are excited to visit soon. I hope to travel to the birth area of the boys when I go. I will be doing a lot fundraising for the adoption, so stay tuned!

Activities: The boys get along so well. It is quite amazing. They are great kids. Sophia is walking everywhere now. It is hard to control her.

Well, I just pray we continue to have growth from thm. They are such a blessing!

A new forever family

2007-03-05T21:09:00.000-08:00

I had the priveledge of visiting the airport tonight to welcome home our friends with their two new Ethiopian children. Just seeing them I remembered how hard the trip home was and how exhausted you are. So please pray for this family. Pray for their daughter they had to leave behind in Ethiopia. They don't have a Visa yet for her and so they have to go back again. Pray for their safety as they drive 2 hours home tonight. Praise God for their children and that they are home!

Miracle number 1 in Adoption

2007-02-28T19:25:00.000-08:00

"I will thank you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done. I will be filled with joy because of you. I will sing praises to your name, O Most High." Psalm9:1-2
A miracle to see - our Kevin sleeping with our Sophia. This is the boy who "will never hold her. She is your responsibility, not mine" has grown to "HI baby!"

So, you could give timelines of adoption just as a pregnancy. It is after all a birth of a child. Isn't that what a pregnancy is, a birth? Nafkot has been growing in my heart day after day just as all my children did. So, you could say we are in the first trimester. I sent off the dossier this week and it is on its way to Washinton D.C. What is a dossier? Some crazy french thing I guess. :) It is a whole bunch of paperwork, birth certificates, marriage certificates, bank statements, medical statements, reference letters, tax forms, power of attorney, etc. I will

say the second time around is soooooo much easier. So our next step is waiting for a court date. I am hoping to get one in the next 3 months. I'll keep you updated. Please keep our new little one in your prayers as we got some medical tests and her blood work doesn't look great.

Sophia is growing like crazy. She can now say Meow, Woof, justin, caycay(caleb), kevin, mama, again, nick. She is finally mostly walking (and falling). It is fun to watch her waddle. She loves to hang out with me in the kitchen and help fold clothes. She is already at a 12-18 month size. She is definitely a curious girl. She loves playing with all her brothers.
Caleb continues to amaze me with his funny personality. He is just always smiling (unless he just got in trouble, which is often). He is starting to figure out how to sound out words and spell. He understands it so well. Everything is just so dramatic with him.
Giovanni continues to be our quiet serious little guy. He tries so hard to do things. He is slowly understanding word sounds to spell. He really wants to learn. His writing skills are great and he understands how to write. He loves to draw pictures. He drew one of Nick playing hockey and Kevin farting in his face (I guess I could say tooting to be more appropriate, but then it wouldn't be the Raskells).

They love to dance and I introduced them to Toby Mac (a Christian rap artist). They have fun dancing in the kitchen.
Kevin is working like crazy and going to school. Nick just started tennis, so he is going to be busy. Malcom should be home in about 2 more months. We MISS you Malcom!
So, such is our world of chaos. Giovanni's birthday is in a couple of weeks. My parents and Grandma are coming to visit that weekend. It should be fun.
Well, kids are going crazy. So, time to go.

I know, not the safest activity, but man it is funny. STAIR SLIDING! This is Giovanni's 5th attempt. He had a ball!

Carnival Raskell - All the boys wrestling and having fun.

Our friends who are in Ethiopia right now picking up 2 of 3 children. They are going to get pictures of our beloved new little one!

Even better, Kevin stair sliding. Note the cell phone pictures.

You can't really see it, but we afroed (did I spell that right) the boys' hair and put the pick in it. They liked it.

La-la-la-la we have smurfs!

Giovanni sporting the fro.

A new Raskell

2007-02-15T12:29:00.000-08:00

Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you. James 1:27

So, I know it has been awhile since I posted. Life has been, well, busy. I really never thought it would be so tiring to be a mother of 6, work 40 hours, and still manage a household. Sheesh, I am tired!

I wanted to let all of you faithful friends and readers know that we will be adding another Raskell to our family. Her name is Nafkot and she is a 2 yr old Ethiopian girl. We met her while in Addis Ababa at an orphanage and she stole my hubby's heart. We are about 6 months away from picking her up. I am hoping to be better about posting here and keeping everyone updated. She is really a sweetie and she looks like Sophia!

We are waiting for documents from our agency to start our dossier. I have already started compiling parts of it thanks to a heads up from my friend. Once we send in the dossier it will be sent to the agency, then to Washington DC and then on to Ethiopia. From there we will wait for a court date. Once our court date is successful (assuming God still wants her here) we will wait for our embassy date. We are using a different orphanage and agency so our embassy date will be later than before. We are assuming 8-10 weeks after court we will travel.

This was a tough decision. Before we left Ethiopia, George had said "I think we should bring her home." I said "Yeah, right. If you are serious YOU are doing ALL the paperwork." Well, months later, through prayer and God's leading I started the paperwork not HIM. I guess working on the paperwork helps make her a reality a little more. Some moments God comforts my heart and I know everything will be ok, other moments I want to fly overseas to hold her and take her to the doctor to make sure everything is ok. She had TB a few months ago. I prayed to the Lord "If you want her Lord, take her. Let her be healthy and free. If you want her here, heal her and prepare my heart for her." Monday morning I heard she was in recovery and doing well. God had answered my prayer and my heart now loved 7 children instead of 6.

God has been so faithful to us since we followed His will and not our own. This whole process is in His hands and He has made every step possible.

We are hoping to pay for this adoption solely on grants and donations and fundraising. We have been blessed so far and we are only about $4000 short (travel and embassy stuff). He has blessed us with everything else so far. So, keep posted. I am working on eventually selling bracelets and tshirts as a fundraiser. I know God will mutliply these too! He is so wonderful and faithful to those who trust in Him.

So, on the other home front (yes, Ethiopia is a home front and I will always have a special place in my heart for it). Sophia turned 1 last week. To match her age, she has 1 tooth. I think all the other teeth will pop in at once. She has done really well after her tubes and we haven't had 1 ear infection since. She loves daycare and they love her. She is starting to throw tantrums which is quite funny. She still refuses to walk as crawling is easier. She has added nice, thank you, shoe, caleb, reading and singing to her list of accomplishments. She loves to dance too!

Giovanni is doing well. He loves school and enjoys to continue to look at books and magazines. If only he would look at the words and not the pictures. He is such a lover. He loves to just sit and cuddle. What a sensitive little man!

Caleb, is well, Caleb. If you have ever met him, he is our funny man. Everything is always funny. He laughs and laughs and talks and talks. I think we will have our hands full. He enjoys video games. Kevin is very proud of him as he has "skills" for video games. Too bad he only gets to play them when Kev watches them. :)

Nick is doing well. He just started working with his brother Kevin at the car wash. Only a month and we have already heard "I don't want to work." Too funny. Hockey is going great and he is the superstar. He had a luncheon he was picked for for sports. He put together a dodge ball team and won the tournament last week. He is just a natural sportsplayer.

Kevin continues to go to school and work. We see him more and more as he matures and wants to hang out with us. I even got a Valentines hug! (we never get hugs from him) He has matured so much and he loves his little brothers and sister.

Malcom is at Sheppard AFB and will be shipped to Germany after Tech School. He is pretty excited. I wish it were closer so we could see him, but what an experience!

We have another young man living with us, Justin. He is a friend of Nick's and he is staying with us while attending school. He is also working at the car wash.

George is doing well. He has a cold now so he will be out of commission for awhile. :( He continues to amaze me as a father to a little girl. Boy does she melt his heart!

Well, now that I have babbled forever! I hope all is well with you all. I will post more pictures later as I haven't downloaded a lot them.

Blessings,
Sandra

So, Kevin and his friend decided to attempt this crazy jump. Kevin landed on Jake. It was hilarious!

Kevin and his baby sis!

Kevin, Jake and the little boys.

Contentment and Joy

2007-01-25T19:39:00.000-08:00

"Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits at God's right hand in the place of honor and power. Let heaven fill your thoughts. Do not think only about things down here on earth. For you died when Christ died, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God. And when Christ, who is your real life, is revealed to the whole world, you will share in all his glory." Colossians 3:1-4

Do you ever have those moments in life where you realize everything is as it should be and you are truly content. God has revealed to me, through friends, prayer, His Word, and His Spirit, what contentment and joy is all about. I have realized that it really doesn't matter if we get a boat, or if we have the coolest car, or the Nordstrom's clothes. We have food, laughter, water, heat, love and our Lord. I just love my life. I have my moments of stress (like tonight trying to feed a screaming angry baby, two little boys and two dogs), but in the end, I am only here to glorify our Lord.

So, what have we been up to since Christmas? New Year's, of course. We lit off fireworks and only had one go astray into the neighbor's car, Nick's car and our other neighbor's. It was fun to see their excitement. Sophia had tubes put in her ears. For the first time since arriving home, she has NO EAR INFECTIONS! Yeah! The day after her surgery, hubby and teenagers and I went to San Antonio to see Malcom's graduation. It was a wonderful week full of sadness, sickness, friends, and family. It was so nice to get away! My mom drove over from Montana to watch the kids. Below are some pictures of our journey.

So, aside from ER visits, fever, chills and tears to see Malcom go again, what was the highlight of the trip (aside from seeing Malcom and his graduation ceremony that is), you ask? Meeting the most wonderful people in Texas! I have been corresponding with a group of adoptive parents (ok, mostly moms with a few dads) from all over the US. We are tight group of believers who support each other through anything. Well, I finally got to meet two of them. We had been talking for a little bit, and I am so glad we met. I can't wait to see her again! We had to work hard at our meeting, though. Through the ER visit for George and I (um yes, potential blood clots and vaccine reaction), our friends saved the day when they picked up our boys from the Air Force Base, took them to the hockey game while waiting for us to show up. Then they had to leave early the next day because of an ice storm. I just have to say, next time WE WILL have more time together. Can you believe we never even got a picture of them? Crazy it was! It was such a blessing to get to know them more. I just wish busy lives didn't get in the way of visiting with all my friends.

Other than that, things are well. Life is great. The kids are doing awesome. Sophia has grown so much. She is walking occasionally and has just sprouted. She can say daddy, mama, kitty, doggie, thank you, all done, uh-oh, wall, tries meow and high chair, hi, cracker. She loves to dance to any type of music. Her little tush goes back and forth. The boys are getting bigger, too. They keep outgrowing their clothes. They are doing well at school and love to go.

Well, I hope all is well. Below, as usual, are the pictures my dear friends remind me they want more of. :) I pray you all find the joy and contentment that God gives you!

Little steps to Kevin! Boy does she adore her Kevin. :)

Nick, Dad, Kevin at the Riverwalk in San Antonio. Notice George's $7 cup of coffee.

Grandma and little Sophia after eating birthday cake.

This was at the wax museum we visited. It really was life like.

The Alamo at night (it only took like 2 hours to find).

The morning of Malcom's graduation.

Malcom is in the front corner. We are soooooooo proud of him!

The Raskells (minus little ones) in front of the Alamo.

Christmas - Well, maybe a little much

2006-12-29T21:17:00.000-08:00

"Look! The virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son,and they will call him Immanuel,* which means `God is with us.'" Matthew 1:23

And so we entered another Christmas. This year, our house had so many changes. I remember sitting on my couch last year reading a book about one families adoption story. For 4 hours I sat and read and cried. This is when God first called me to adoption. It was a long road over the next couple of weeks. I so wanted to bring home a baby girl. Finally George felt the calling too and so we started 2006. Our year has been crazy. We went from 3 teenage boys to 3 teenage boys and 3 little children. God has been so amazing in His blessings and His provisions in our life. This Christmas I had a whole new outlook on what it means to celebrated Christ's birth. It is so hard to get caught up in the "holiday" season of shopping, food and family. I forgot what it truly meant. I took Jesus out of the equation of Christmas and put so much emphasis on it being "the new children's first Christmas". So, as we try to contain the sheer overload of emotions from 2 little Ethiopian boys, I am trying to regain my faith and living for Christ.

The last couple of days has been hard. For three days I have tried to get to Urgent Care to get meds for this cold that won't go away. Instead last night we ended up at the pediatrician's office for Sophia. Her eye looked like she had been in a boxing ring and lost. She has cellulitis of the eye (aka a deep tissue infection). They gave her a shot in her leg of antibiotics. By this morning, she wasn't any better so they gave her another shot. Tonight we gave her more antibiotics, but it still looks the same. We go in in the morning to check again. If it is not better, we will admit her to the hospital. Poor baby! I think I am more concerned than her.

We heard from Malcom. He is doing ok. Not great, not bad. Basic Training is hard and he is counting the number of days until he is done. It sounds like he is the top of his class. I am so proud of him. I miss him terribly. My heart still aches to hear those footsteps stumbling down the stairs, or the funny stories he comes up with, or just his listening ear. There is a huge void in my heart. I can't wait to see him in just 2 weeks!

We have another boy moving in with us. This time it is Nick's friend. His parents moved to Vegas but he really wants to be here to finish school. At least this time we know he has parents who love him.

We also have another surprise in the making, but it is not ready for cyber space yet, only a select few friends and family members. Once the time is right I will reveal all.

I leave you with some funny pictures of our Christmas. Have a wonderful New Year!

The yearly tradition and my father-in-laws. My family even went this year. It is chaos, but we love it!

Our insanely packed with presents Christmas Tree.

Grandpa made his first granddaughter a rocking horse. It is so cute and she loves it!

Look who got robes. Hmmm, doesn't seem right.

Wait, this is the right one!

Sophia opening my best friend and sister and neighbor everything a girl could want in a friend - yeah her present all the way from Mexico.

Caleb's sombrero and maracha's from Mexico!

My brother, Uncle Bob, got them Captain Jack Sparrow costumes. They are so cool looking! They love to play pirate.

Here is Giovanni with his sombrero and a plaque Grandpa made for him with horses.

Here I come, Ready or not

2006-12-10T09:49:00.000-08:00

"And the most important piece of clothing you must wear is love. Love is what binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as membres of one body you are all called to live in peace. And always be thankful." Colossians 3:14-15

Life is so awesome! We have so much to be thankful for. In the last week I have really been hit hard on forgiveness. A week or so ago, a friend of our had his sentencing for murder. This guy is 19 yrs old. He got caught up into drugs and the worst that could happen did. At the sentencing, the mother of the victim pleaded for a reduced sentencing. She had forgiven this young man for what he did. Why? Because the has Christ in her heart and knows that at the root of life, is forgiveness. I was moved by her comments and love of the Lord. So, I have finally realized than when I don't forgive, in the same breath I hate those that I can't forgive. For months I held on to bitterness for my husband, and I finally released that bitterness by forgiving him.

Forgiveness is Divine. It is our wonderful example of God's love for us. Christ showed us this love and forgiveness when, on the cross right before his death, He asked for forgiveness for us! When we don't forgive others, how can we spread the word of the Lord? Why would anyone want to believe someone about Christ if they can't even forgive, just as Christ forgave us. As our pastor said at service, my forgiveness of others is the barometer of my appreciation of God's forgiveness. So, I ask, who do you have to forgive? An ex-boyfriend/husband, a sibling, a parent, a co-worker, a friend, a teacher, or most importantly - yourself. When we got to God and seek forgiveness our slate is wiped clean. Like a white board, there is no more evidence of our wrongs on God's white board. So, today I am going to forgive all that I can. And each time I am wronged I will search my heart for this forgiveness and as I wrong others, seek their forgiveness.

On to the homefront, Malcom has been gone for almost 2 weeks. I didn't realize how hard it would be! When cooking I still make sure we save some for him! We go to see his graduation in January! Yeah! Warmth of Texas during our coldest month when it normally goes below zero! Oh, and Sea World and Six Flags. Oh the excitement of this small town girl.

Yesterday we went to see Santa. I wasn't going to instil in the boys Santa, but they have picked up on the fantasy from school. So, we are in a dilema. How do you tell them he (and superman and spiderman) are not real? How do you explain why there was no Santa in Ethiopia. This jury is still out on Santa, toothfairy, etc. We'll see. But, I must say, Santa is a friend of Malcom so it was hilarious to see Caleb and Giovanni's faces when he called them by name! Oh, Sophia freaked! We got pictures taken, so I will post them after I scan them.

We also went Christmas tree hunting and found one! It was so fun. Poor Caleb. Being the youngest boy he gets picked on by ALL his older brothers. I have never seen a kid get pelted by so many snowballs. Finally he said "I don't like flying balls. No more. I'm cold." Sophia didn't like the cold and rain much. We are hoping to get the tree up today.

Caleb is so funny. They play hide-and-seek all the time. Well, we taught them, ready or not here I come. But it always comes out, Here I come! Ready or not! They are so hilarious sometimes. Like last night after the hockey game, Caleb wearing the popcorn bucket on his head saying it is a helmet to protect him from snow! A giovanni always laughing at the funniest things! He randomly said "Lighting McQueen" fully! He also likes to say "My mama is belisamo!" Gee, I wonder who taught him that?

Here are some pictures in no particular order!

Our last night to see Malcom. This was taken at his hotel.

Our family Christmas Tree!

Sophia is walking around with her new toy. She does pretty good. Anyday now she will be walking!

Kevin's glorious pose Christmas tree hunting!

Nick's dive of Superman!

Nick and Giovanni racing through the Christmas trees!

Ok, so I fully admit I love watching boys slide down our stairs in boxes. It is hilarious! Here goes Giovanni!

Here is Caleb's face plant. No injuries. We need to get a laudry basket for better sliding.

Off into the wide blue yonder....

2006-11-26T07:33:00.000-08:00

So, I always write about the little ones as if the older ones are forgotten. On Monday we will lose our oldest son, Malcom. He will check into his hotel and then on Tuesday will be sworn in for the Air Force. We are so proud of him and all his decisions in life. He has been with us for a little over 2 years and it has been great. From the moment he walked in, we knew he was one of us. So, today I will reflect on our two years with Malcom.

1. What used to be hard to get him to do (chores), he has done willingly over the last couple of months.
2. He loves the new little ones and is always ready to wrestle.
3. He is a hard worker - at everything he does.
4. He has a soft and genuine heart.
5. He loves swords and fantasy things.
6. He is a wealth of knowledge - always learning.
7. When he loves something, they are blessed.
8. We are blessed because of him.
9. He is a piece of our puzzle that will be missed.
10. He still doesn't have his driver's license (hmmm...)
11. He likes Superman and importantly - Smallville.
12. He doesn't like to get his picture taken.
12. He gets this quirky smile when he gets nervous or embarassed.
13. He will do great in the Air Force.
14. He is very dedicated to whatever he is doing.
15. Finally, he is our son and we are so sad to see him go.

We love you Malcom! We will miss you!

This is from our going away pizza party last night. We brought in over 2000 prize tickets and got like $10 worth of junk! :)

Kids, no matter what age, love playlands.

Superman! Don't you love the masks?

Even Grandma and Grandpa got into it!

Surprise! See, there is that smile!

The gang - Most of these kids are always at our house. And yes, the guy in the back is that tall.

What's a party without silly string!

The new phone books are here! The new phone books are here!

2006-11-21T21:26:00.000-08:00

So, our boy's school has little phone books with all their classmates. We have gotten 3 phone calls since. The first was a little boy. Then 2nd and 3rd were from a girl for Caleb. Ooooohhhh, I think he has a kindergarten girlfriend! Have you ever truly listened to a phone call from a child from Ethiopia who speaks little english and some other 5/6 yr old? It is awesome! Giovanni and the little boy said "what" at the same time which then erupted into laughter for about 5 minutes!

Life is good here. The boys are somewhat excited about Thanksgiving. The were really excited until I explained there are no presents (wrong holiday). It amazes me everyday how great they are doing. Caleb is speaking mostly in full sentences. Giovanni is still struggling with feeling like he is equally loved. He acts like he doesn't know how to count or his letters if he feels he will get more attention. They had their first birthday party for a friend today. It was pretty funny. I think they were kind of wondering if the presents were for them. It was funny. I feel bad because theirs aren't for awhile. :(

Malcom leaves for the Air Force next week. I am so very sad. I think the boys are going to have a really rough time of it. They have totally bonded to him. He has been a lifesave watching them for us. We are hoping to make it to his graduation in January. We'll see. He is cookie monster here.

Lately I have really been thinking a lot about my life. I am so incredibly blessed with my family, my friends, my job, my house and most importantly my God. He has totally filled my life. I know there is so much more He has planned and I can't wait to see what it is. He has given so much to all of us, why shouldn't I give a little back.

Here are some pictures of the kids. I hope life is treating you all well. I can't believe it has already been 4 months since coming home!

They can't wait till Hockey!

The boys gave their teacher a Thanksgiving present. Here is their first wrapping job. They picked out the wrapping paper (christmas). :) Please note Caleb's too small Nemo pjs. :)

Yes, unfortunately it is starting to get cold. This, however, was for her first hockey game of Nick's. Cold rink.

This is what happens when your daddy piles tons of toys on his daughter. It was hillarious!

Beautiful One

2006-11-07T12:45:00.000-08:00

"Beautiful one I love
Beautiful one I adore
Beautiful one my soul must sing

You’ve opened my eyes to your wonders anew
Captured my heart with this love‘
Cause nothing on earth is as beautiful as you"
-Beautiful One by Chris Tomlin

This song hit me hard one day at church. We were singing it (how many times have I sung this song before?) and God poured His Spirit onto my heart. I thought of more than just the beauty of Christ (OK, nothing is more beautiful, I know), I thought of the beauty of Ethiopia. God totally opened my eyes to ALL of His wonders. Ethiopia is truly beautiful. Before we went, I thought all it was a dirty place full of sickness, death and poverty. There is so much more than any of that. Along the dirty streets walks two men holding hands in friendship wearing beige suits - clean ones. There is the mother who carries her baby obviously in love. The girls talking on the side of the road roasting corn having a good time. These are not forgotten people. They are blessed so much by God. Their lives are so simple. There is no materialism (except maybe the upper class), there is no "one uping" each other, no fighting your way to the top, and especially not worried about what others think. I love Ethiopia. It is always in my heart. I cannot wait to go back. I know God has more planned for this family and I can't wait until we find out more!

God has changed me so much in the last few weeks. For the first time in my life, I get it! I get why I am here, I get why I go without, I get why I suffer, and most importantly, I get why He died for me, for you, for everyone. I don't want to deny Him anymore. When I approach God and Christ in the Throne Room I want him to say "Well done good and faithful servant". Our pastor has gone through the book of Ephesians the last few weeks. It is such an awesome book. He made the comment one day "Do I encourage others of the love of God or do I encourage the Devil to continue his path of destruction?" I know now that I encourage the Devil more times than God's love. I hold a lot of anger and bitterness at people and groups for "things they did to me". Through this study, God's Spirit and prayer I have learned to give these feelings to God to take care of. In Ephesians 4:31-32 Paul says "Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you." I also have realized that who we are in relationship with here on Earth and how we treat them is the type of relationship I have with God. So basically, when I treat a co-worker I don't like badly, I am telling God I don't like Him either. Sheesh! Kind of puts things into perspective, huh. I have found that rather than forgiving and letting go of things, I hold it in and find the bitterness building up and then the gossip comes out. I am an awful gossip. I hate it! But some days, I just can't stop. I have tried over the last week to not feed into the urge to talk about others. I have done ok. Do any of you suffer from it to? It is like you know what you are saying is wrong, but the words (and thoughts) just freely flow! I am really trying to talk to God about these things. I just know that God hears every word and action we do and think towards others. It is so easy to become consumed with the wrongs that others have done to me, that I really have to give it up!

Finally, I am really working on what God's plan is for me as a parent. I am constantly reminded that we are to adopt just as God calls us all to. We were (and are) adopted into His Kingdom. The perfect example is of Joseph. He is not the biological father of Jesus, but he raised him as his own. My boys have at least 2 mommies and 2 daddies. I will never deny them of their "Wolaita mommy and daddy". I wish with my heart their parents were still alive so that I could meet them. I hope to in Heaven. I think about the parents who give their children up - whether here in America or in another Country. I think for most parents to give up their children is the greatest sacrifice. A friend of mine adopted domestically. She met the birth parents and has pictures of them. They loved their little girl so much, but they knew they had to give her up. The same goes with some of the parents in Ethiopia. They give up their children knowing there is a better life for them. They know their children can grow up, graduate from high school, go to college and become succesful. They know their children will become orphans soon enough if they stay. They dream and pray for them everyday, hoping their children are safe. As Americans, we can not phathom what a parent must be thinking in Ethiopia to have to give up their child. Such was God - He loves us so much as His children, He sacrificed His only child to save His adopted children. How He must have wept the day Christ breathed His last breath. And with the same tears, the joy that He must have felt knowing we can have our relationship back with Him.

Well, those are my thoughts. I have been processing so much lately. Thanks for reading. I hope I make sense and maybe this will help some of you who are struggling.

So, along with all the "deep thoughts by me", here are some pretty funny comments made by my munchkins.

"Are you ok, strong boy?" Caleb to mommy when she said ouch.
"1 more nite-nite till Trick-or-Treat" Giovanni on Halloween night, thinking they would go again the next day.
"Mommy, I am drinking the snow!" Our first snow fall and Caleb's beliefs of snow. None stuck. :(
"MOMMMMYYYYY, clock singing SCARED!" Caleb and Giovanni after the alarm went off on their alarm clock (mysteriously we don't know who set it).

Each day we hear and see something new from these boys. It is so awesome to have them. I couldn't imagine life without them. Sophia is now laughing at anything and everything. She'll laugh for 10 minutes - even at midnight! She is just such a happy baby. She is really starting to say mamamama and dadadadada knowing it is my hubby and I. I think she also tried to say Kevin (her favorite big brother) but it came out "Kay". She adores him! It is such a beautiful thing to walk in the room and see her look at you with pure love. She has become quite the daddy's girl. I know there will be a lot of "Daddddy, pleeeeease" with the batting of the eyes.

Life is going well. We are back into Hockey season (FINALLY!). Hubby is coaching Nick and they have their first game Saturday. I am so glad to start again. Next year we will start the little boys in Hockey.

Well, I leave you with some Halloween Pictures. We had a ball! The kids loved the school carnival and Trick-or-Treating. Thanks for reading!

This is the pumkin outfit my mom bought her. She is so stinking cute!

I think we have a spider in our midst! It took some coxing to get Caleb back into Spiderman. He became consume with Superman, but we already bought his costume.

Here is our other Super hero. We are an everything Superman house. Superman is STRONG so are the boys.

Their first cake walk. All the boys each won - and picked out cupcakes. We had cupcakes coming out of our ears!

Sophia had two costumes, the pumkin and this monkey. We never got pics of her in her full costume. Those will come soon. This is most of the costume minus the hat. She is enjoying her first sucker.

My cousin/Godmother and hubby sent this cool chalkboard paper for the boys wall. Too bad it didn't come the day before since Giovanni wrote on his dresser in permanaent ink!

Finally, our little girl with her common face. I love this look! She does it all the time, but I finally got a picture of her.

2006-10-23T22:22:00.000-07:00

So, isn’t it amazing how we can justify anything? My husband started it (didn’t Adam blame Eve from the beginning?), you know. He made the justification of buying “Over the Hedge” with money already spent. He returned something from Wal-Mart and felt he really needed to get it. Little did he know I broke down and purchased Cinnamon Bears from Bulk. So, then tonight I was supposed to meet some ladies from church at Starbucks, so I used the “already spent money” to get a coffee. I know, I know, cheating. But I really thought they were going to show up and it is for a good cause – right? NOT! I guess we will have to tack on penalty days to our 30 days of nothing.

This weekend I went to an adoptive mom’s retreat. It was fantastic. I had more free time in those 2 days than the last 3 months! I met a lot of wonderful women and it was great to have someone there who understands me. The best part, aside from the friendships, the food, the late night talks, reading uninterrupted, etc, was coming home to my family who worked hard to do the dishes, clean the basement and do laundry. It was fabulous!

Life is going along great. We are growing the boys hair out to look “big”, as they call it. Sophia is doing wonderful. We just have such a great family. I love the blessings God has given us. I praise him everyday for all that I have.

Hockey season started with George coaching Nick again this year. We decided to hold off on the boys one year until next year when we can focus on teaching them more. They went to practice with George on Saturday and had fun. Dad unfortunately was tripped accidentally and fell onto the ice with a nice bump. Thankfully he doesn’t appear he had a concussion or a cut. Just a headache. I am so excited for hockey to start! I never realize how much I miss it, until it is almost time to start.

Well, since I have a few minutes of free time I am going to read. I hope you are all doing well. Thanks for reading!

Caleb loves to have Reeses in the room with him. On this night he moved away from his pillow to be with him. You can't see his hand resting on Reeses' neck.

We have a new weight lifter in our house! The boys love Superman and will do anything to be like him. Giovanni loves to lift weights, and drink milk, and eat things he doesn't like just because Superman does.

Day 11 (but who is counting?)

2006-10-19T13:09:00.000-07:00

But now a righteousness from God, apart from law, has been made known, to which the Law and the Prophets testify. This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood. He did this to demonstrate his justice, because in his forbearance he had left the sins committed beforehand unpunished— he did it to demonstrate his justice at the present time, so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in Jesus. Romans 3:21-26

So this week in bible study we studied this passage. We talked a lot about God's righteousness and our. I still am in awe of the grace he gives to us. How can he forgive me when I curse Him, forget Him, deny Him? But the awesome thing is - He does. I caught a little glimpse of the love He has for us. On Monday, Caleb was messing around in the bathroom sink making a mess. He has been told many times not too. So, he got "talked" to. I didn't yell, I was just very firm. He started crying. My heart broke. Eventhough he was in trouble and I wouldn't back down on that, I knew he needed to understand why. How do you explain to a 5 yr old kid who doesn't speak your language? I realized this is how it is with God. We mess up and feel so bad. We wonder how God can love us because we messed up. Just because Caleb didn't obey does not mean I love him any less. I love him more and more each day. God loves me even though everyday I mess up. How many times have I gone to God crying out of shame and sadness for what I have done. After explaining to Caleb what he did, I held him in my arms and told him how much I loved him, that I wasn't going away, and that he wasn't going anywhere. I realized, God holds me in His arms and comforts me ALL THE TIME. Caleb let me hold him, rock him and wipe the tears away. Do we let God do this? I know most of the time I push Him away saying "I am fine, I will be ok. I don't need you." I am so wrong. Isn't it a shame we push God away so many times when all He wants to do is rock us, pat our backs, and smother us in kisses (ewwwww Mommy! No kissing!). I love God and I love my kids.

I have this great friend who just sent me a CD of Mark Shultz. In one of his songs he talks about being a child and waiting. I cried when I first heard it. It is beautiful. Here is part of the song:
Oh child, precious one
Let your life shine like the sun
But you say “How long ‘til I can come home
‘Til I can rest in your arms again”
And I say “Not long but don’t miss this life and I’ll beWaiting ‘til then”
Live with the wonder of a child
Pray with your arms thrown open wide
Love with a love that has no end
Until I see you again
Oh child, precious one
With each breath know you are loved
But you say “How long ‘til I can come home
‘Til I can rest in your arms again”
And I say “Not long but don’t miss this life and I’ll beWaiting ‘til then”

How true. Everyday I pray for the childlike faith. I know I will see Christ again and then I will truly rest. But for now, live with Spirit, Love, and hope of the Lord.

OK, so finally I get to my discussion of "30 days of nothing". We are on day 11. Well, we have done really well with nothing. I admit we did break the rules for two nights. Every year we go to the corn maze. We splurged and went with the whole family. It was by God's grace we were all together (well at least until we entered the maze). It was so fun! For about half the time we pushed the stroller and then I decided to carry Sophia. The boys were hilarious! They didn't know if they should be scared or excited. At one point, Caleb said "Ohhhhh, scary over there. Giovanni you go!" It was so Caleb-style. I think they enjoyed carrying the flashlights more than going in the maze. It was great to have the big boys "scare" them from time to time and hide the corn.

The other thing we did was dinner with 7 other adoptive families that were here for training. It was well worth the "cheating" to meet them all. Other than those two times, we have had no lattees, fountain pops, fast food, restaraunts, ice cream runs, etc. It has been great getting into a schedule of dinners, lunches, and evenings. I miss lattes the most. We have pop at work provided by our boss, so fountain drinks are not that missed. I miss Starbucks on an early Saturday morning or before church. I know the boys miss chicken and french fries, but they are starting to learn we aren't doing that anymore. The sad thing is we still have so much! We act like it is some big sacrifice we are doing, but we really aren't.

We have had a great week. The boys are really starting to pick up everything. They are starting to recognize the sounds of letters and what they are, they almost have their ABC's down, they can partially count till 20, they are slowly getting better at puting lotion on and brushing teeth, and their language is awesome! We communicate so well. They even are starting to tease with us. They eat almost anything and have learned to say "I like ____" I don't like ____". They only really don't like soups, pb&j, and sausage and gravy. They have learned to eat whatever is put in front of them. We haven't had a "throw up" incident with Giovanni for quite awhile.

So, today is the 3month anniversary of returning home with them. Soon I hope to post some then and now items to remind me and everyone else, how far they have come.

With that, I leave you with pictures (did you think I would forget?).

How can you not go "Ohhhh, she is so cute"? This was a gift from my mom.

Dancing babies. They love to dance!

I definitely think the fro is George and blond is Sophia. What do you think?

Day 2/3

2006-10-11T19:18:00.000-07:00

Are any of you suffering hardships? You should pray. Are any of you happy? You should sing praises. Are any of you sick? You should call for the elders of the church to come and pray over you, anointing you with oil in the name of the Lord. Such a prayer offered in faith will heal the sick, and the Lord will make you well. And if you have committed any sins, you will be forgiven. Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. James 5:13-16

So, we are well into Day 3. I am doing pretty good. I admit this morning I craved a latte. I think it is because I can't have it. So far we have had sandwiches, chicken and pasta, rolls, pizza, left overs, and pork and potatoes. Tomorrow - lasagna. We did have to break down and go to the store to get some night-time undies for the boys. Still unprepared.

So, Sophia grows more and more each day. She had her check-up yesterday along with 5 shots. She cried for about 10 minutes and then was happy again. She is happy all the time! She also slept through the night last night. I know she has a cold, so that probably helped. I know I slept good!

The boys continue to thrive and learn more and more words each day. George and I get the priveledge of meeting a lot of families who are also adopting from our agency. It will be exciting to meet them and be able to give them insight.

So, what was wonderful about today? As stated in James, prayer goes so far when we earnestly pray. Today we received a donation from my aunt and uncle. We need this money for our readoption. Then we found out we can do our readoption ourselves, thus saving money. So, this money will pay for all the court fees and we won't have to come up with any other money! Then I received a call from one of the pastors at our church to pray over us and our future ministry in Ethiopia. We go to a large church and typically they pray for each prayer request and send a card. This was the first time we have received a phone call. I just know God has something planned for us. I just can't wait to go to Ethiopia again.

Well, I better get back to work. I have some hours to catch up on. I hope life is treating you all well.

I finally found our camera I lost after our trip to Montana in early August. Here are some pictures at Bozeman's Sweat Pea festival. We stood in line for face painting just to find out they were closing, so I attempted Sponge Bob and an Ethiopian Flag.

Grandma Mabel playing with her great-granddaughter Sophia.

Here is Nick, Caleb, Giovanni, Sophia and Mommy at the North Entrance to the park. Pretty cool to have most of my children there for a picture.

This is at Old Faithful. The boys were pretty shocked to see the water "on".

Day 1

2006-10-10T12:22:00.000-07:00

So, I made it through the first day. I never realized how many times I stop at the store to buy things. Last night in a 2 hour period I wanted a Sprite from the gas station (we all know fountain pop is better than canned pop). Of course the first day really wasn't bad. I am really curious to see how Day 15 is once a lot of the food is dwindling.

Giovanni, Nick, and Sophia are sick with chest colds. We have the revolving colds in our house. I wonder who will be next? Malcom, George and I just got over it.

I have been humbled a lot lately thinking about what "the perfect family" should be. I grew up thinking I would have a boy and a girl - only. They would be the perfect children, getting along with no fights. Then I married George with teenage boys. I have actually become immune to boy antics. For example (I LOVE YOU MOM!) this weekend Nick farted in on of the little boys' faces. This is a reality in our house. There are 2 females there - me and Sophia. According to the boys, I don't count and really Sophia doesn't either because she is a baby. Boys rule our house. My mom was appalled that those things occur in our house. I reminded her that they are just boys and that my brother did it to me and she was more appalled. It was quite cute to see her face. It was then that I realized nasty boy stuff really doesn't bother me anymore. They smell just as bad as the dogs and Sophia's diapers, so who cares. Bless my mom for having never knowing the full impact of my brother and I. I stress a lot about having our house clean, quite, perfect. Why? Really, does it matter? No, these kids are having fun. So what if I don't get to putting things away? We are dancing, or singing, or laughing, or playing. My kids rock - all of them.

So with that, a lady I know mentioned once to put down the simple pleasures of life. Here are mine today. What are yours?

Baby smiles
Baby laughs
Baby feet
Caleb's copying
Giovanni's eyes
Fresh caramel apples
hugs from the hubby
little boys dancing to German music
Sophia crawling over and putting her hands on my legs
Brutus slobber (one more day that he is here!)
Reese's kisses
Kevin's smile
Nick's screams
Malcoms stories
Quiet moments with God
The Spirit in me
Caleb singing, singing, singing

Giovanni at Greenbluff in the hay maze.

Our little guy, always smiling.

The boys all pickin' apples. They are delicious! Washington home grown apples - now that is definitely a simple pleasure!

Even Sophia picked an apple. She definitely likes the taste of them.

30 days of nothing

2006-10-08T22:36:00.000-07:00

So, we are starting something new. A couple of weeks ago I read about a group of people for 30 days going down to living on nothing. Cutting out fast food, lattes, electricity, creamer, butter, extras, movies, etc. So, I thought, why not? Why not try to understand what it would be like for our children on one day and go without electricity or eat just rice for a day. Even doing this I will never fully understand how difficult it must be to watch your parents die of measles or AIDS, or TB, or fire, or infection. Or what it really must feel like to every day eat potatoes and injera ONLY. To not have diet pepsi or 4 parts to dinner - meat, bread, veggies, drink. To actually have clean water that a city can vote whether or not to add flouride. Or to have a toothbrush and toothpaste. How sad for my boys to find out they never brushed their teeth until they met us. Caleb told me "No soccer mom, Caleb shoes all gone". How can I ever fathom this?

I told George someday we are going to have to get the big 13 passenger van because we are NOT done with adoption. Whenever God is ready, so are we. My heart yearns to return. To feel like I can do something more for them. Why am I so blessed to be here? Why did God put me here in this house 50 times bigger than their homes? Why did God see that we are worthy of His love and to show others of this love. I sat in church today trying to grasp how much He loves me. I realized that eventhough there is so much sin in my life now, before and later, God sees me as clean, pure and childlike. I thought of Darth Vadar (OK, so I grew up on Star Wars). Anakin was good once, he was drawn to evil. That good never really left him. He did a lot of bad things in his life. His son believed in him that there was just enough good. In the end (sorry if I spoil this for anyone), he too saw there was more to being good than bad. He saved himself. We are to be like this and know that the good in this world is worth so much more. Why be shadowed in the darkness of hatred, lust, envy, evil when we can be in the light of Jesus. God has given us so much, it is the least we can do for him.

So, with that, I will be journaling about our journey of 30 days of nothing over the next month. I must fully admit we stocked up before starting tomorrow. I know a lot of the other families really cut out the "extras". Maybe next month we will try something different. I saw this on http://intent.squarespace.com/ in case any of you decide you would like to try. So, we will see if we bought enough meats, veggies, fruits, etc. Hopefully we don't end up with Top Ramen or Mac'n'Cheese for the last week!

Hope God is blessing you all just as He continues to bless us. May His grace find you always! Thanks for reading.

A parting picture of our weekend picking pumpkins, rasperries and apples. More too come on our Greenbluff trip. Nick, Giovanni and Caleb had a great time bonding together.

Even Sophia had fun with the pumpkins!