"Beautiful one I love
Beautiful one I adore
Beautiful one my soul must sing
You’ve opened my eyes to your wonders anew
Captured my heart with this love‘
Cause nothing on earth is as beautiful as you"
-Beautiful One by Chris Tomlin
This song hit me hard one day at church. We were singing it (how many times have I sung this song before?) and God poured His Spirit onto my heart. I thought of more than just the beauty of Christ (OK, nothing is more beautiful, I
know), I thought of the beauty of Ethiopia. God totally opened my eyes to ALL of His wonders. Ethiopia is truly beautiful. Before we went, I thought all it was a dirty place full of sickness, death and poverty. There is so much more than any of that. Along the dirty streets walks two men holding hands in friendship wearing beige suits - clean ones. There is the mother who carries her baby obviously in love. The girls talking on the side of the road roasting corn having a good time. These are not forgotten people. They are blessed so much by God. Their lives are so simple. There is no materialism (except maybe the upper class), there is no "one uping" each other, no fighting your way to the top, and especially not worried about what others think. I love Ethiopia. It is always in my heart. I cannot wait to go back. I know God has more planned for this family and I can't wait until we find out more!
God has changed me so much in the last few weeks. For the first time in my life, I get it! I get why I am here, I get why I go without, I get why I suffer, and most importantly, I get why He died for me, for you, for everyone. I don't want to deny Him anymore. When I approach God and Christ in the Throne Room I want him to say "Well done good and faithful servant". Our pastor has gone through the book of Ephesians the last few weeks. It is such an awesome book. He made the comment one day "Do I encourage others of the love of God or do I encourage the Devil to continue his path of destruction?" I know now that I encourage the Devil more times than God's love. I hold a lot of anger and bitterness at people and groups for "things they did to me". Through this study, God's Spirit and prayer I have learned to give these feelings to God to take care of. In Ephesians 4:31-32 Paul says "Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you." I also have realized that who we are in relationship with here on Earth and how we treat them is the type of relationship I have with God. So basically, when I treat a co-worker I don't like badly, I am telling God I don't like Him either. Sheesh! Kind of puts things into perspective, huh. I have found that rather than forgiving and letting go of things, I hold it in and find the bitterness building up and then the gossip comes out. I am an awful gossip. I hate it! But some days, I just can't stop. I have tried over the last week to not feed into the urge to talk about others. I have done ok. Do any of you suffer from it to? It is like you know what you are saying is wrong, but the words (and thoughts) just freely flow! I am really trying to talk to God about these things. I just know that God hears every word and action we do and think towards others. It is so easy to become consumed with the wrongs that others have done to me, that I really have to give it up!
Finally, I am really working on what God's plan is for me as a parent. I am constantly reminded that we are to adopt just as God calls us all to. We were (and are) adopted into His Kingdom. The perfect example is of Joseph. He is not the biological father of Jesus, but he raised him as his own. My boys have at least 2 mommies and 2 daddies. I will never deny them of their "Wolaita mommy and daddy". I wish with my heart their parents were still alive so that I could meet them. I hope to in Heaven. I think about the parents who give their children up - whether here in America or in another Country. I think for most parents to give up their children is the greatest sacrifice. A friend of mine adopted domestically. She met the birth parents and has pictures of them. They loved their little girl so much, but they knew they had to give her up. The same goes with some of the parents in Ethiopia. They give up their children knowing there is a better life for them. They know their children can grow up, graduate from high school, go to college and become succesful. They know their children will become orphans soon enough if they stay. They dream and pray for them everyday, hoping their children are safe. As Americans, we can not phathom what a parent must be thinking in Ethiopia to have to give up their child. Such was God - He loves us so much as His children, He sacrificed His only child to save His adopted children. How He must have wept the day Christ breathed His last breath. And with the same tears, the joy that He must have felt knowing we can have our relationship back with Him.
Well, those are my thoughts. I have been processing so much lately. Thanks for reading. I hope I make sense and maybe this will help some of you who are struggling.
So, along with all the "deep thoughts by me", here are some pretty funny comments made by my munchkins.
"Are you ok, strong boy?" Caleb to mommy when she said ouch.
"1 more nite-nite till Trick-or-Treat" Giovanni on Halloween night, thinking they would go again the next day.
"Mommy, I am drinking the snow!" Our first snow fall and Caleb's beliefs of snow. None stuck. :(
"MOMMMMYYYYY, clock singing SCARED!" Caleb and Giovanni after the alarm went off on their alarm clock (mysteriously we don't know who set it).
Each day we hear and see something new from these boys. It is so awesome to have them. I couldn't imagine life without them. Sophia is now laughing at anything and everything. She'll laugh for 10 minutes - even at midnight! She is just such a happy baby. She is really starting to say mamamama and dadadadada knowing it is my hubby and I. I think she also tried to say Kevin (her favorite big brother) but it came out "Kay". She adores him! It is such a beautiful thing to walk in the room and see her look at you with pure love. She has become quite the daddy's girl. I know there will be a lot of "Daddddy, pleeeeease" with the batting of the eyes.
Life is going well. We are back into Hockey season (FINALLY!). Hubby is coaching Nick and they have their first game Saturday. I am so glad to start again. Next year we will start the little boys in Hockey.
Well, I leave you with some Halloween Pictures. We had a ball! The kids loved the school carnival and Trick-or-Treating. Thanks for reading!
This is the pumkin outfit my mom bought her. She is so stinking cute!
I think we have a spider in our midst! It took some coxing to get Caleb back into Spiderman. He became consume with Superman, but we already bought his costume.
Here is our other Super hero. We are an everything Superman house. Superman is STRONG so are the boys.
Their first cake walk. All the boys each won - and picked out cupcakes. We had cupcakes coming out of our ears!
Sophia had two costumes, the pumkin and this monkey. We never got pics of her in her full costume. Those will come soon. This is most of the costume minus the hat. She is enjoying her first sucker.
My cousin/Godmother and hubby sent this cool chalkboard paper for the boys wall. Too bad it didn't come the day before since Giovanni wrote on his dresser in permanaent ink!
Finally, our little girl with her common face. I love this look! She does it all the time, but I finally got a picture of her.
