Adoption Suggestions

So, I have become and experienced blog reader. You don't even want to know how many blogs I have on my favorites. It is such a great way to get advice, encouragement and support. I was reading through a blog this morning and found these top ten helpful hints to support an adoptive family. What a great way to put it! Adoption is a hard process and somedays you just don't want to deal with it and others all you want to do is talk about it. My advice for anyone who knows someone who is adopted, has adopted or is adopting - support them, listen to them and be just as excited as if they are pregnant. I think people tend to think adoption is different from a pregnancy, it really isn't. I love my children and I feel them growing - in my heart.

Ten Ways To Support An Adoptive Family

1. If you're asked to write a reference letter for the homestudy, do it promptly. It will mean a lot to the family to know their adoption is a high priority for you too.

2. Especially if the wait drags on a long time, don't constantly ask if they've heard any news. Some moms adore giving you the blow by blow during the wait. But many moms find the wait difficult, and get tired of saying, "No, we still don't know when he/she is coming home." Ask instead how the nursery is coming along, or invite her out to lunch.

3. Don't ask the parents to share all the details of their child's past. Unless they choose to share it, assume this is private information for the family alone.

4. Do throw them a baby shower and/or bring baby gifts before the child comes home. Honor the adoptive mom with your faith that this will happen for her.

5.Do arrange with friends to bring meals for a week or two after the new child comes home. An adopted child deserves all the normal new-baby hoopla, after all.

6. Do allow the family a couple weeks to settle in together at home. Wait awhile before planning big welcome parties.

7. Don't expect to hold the new child much at first. Even if you're the grandparent, it's a good idea to let the child get used to mom and dad before branching out to extended family and friends.

8. Do offer to take other children in the family for fun outings now and then. They will enjoy the extra attention in the midst of adjusting to a new sibling.

9. Do offer to run errands for the family in the first weeks after homecoming: take siblings to sports practices, get groceries, or run to the dry cleaners. Anything you can do to free up mom's time will help with bonding in those first weeks.

10. Do notice signs that the child is beginning to bond with his/her new family. A mom will treasure an honest heart-felt comment such as, "Wow, look how your baby looks at you! You can tell he is really starting to fall in love with you!"